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After 3 months, the caregiver provided by an agency I was paying quit. I made him keep a log of daily activities, and in those 3 months, he never gave my father a shower. He stated my father had "disabilities and limitations". My father walks with a walker, has dementia and some vision issues, but is by no means incapacitated. He just needs help. Two and a half months prior, a physical therapist came in to show the caregivers how to get him into the shower.

I responded back that I was paying him and the agency to care for my father, and that included at least 1 shower in the 3 months he was employed. I have a camera in my father's room and listened to the caregiver telling my father he was quitting. At no point did the agency ever call me that day to tell me he quit. I called them and they confirmed it.

In those 3 months, the caregiver ruined 2 mattress pads with bleach, almost all of his clothing is bleach-stained, cause a $350 fee to a plumber to rod out the toilet (stuffed with wipes, not once, but twice). The agency never paid their visits as stated when I was sold on their services. The owner came by one morning when the caregiver left the country. I told her how he was very defensive, not motivated, etc. She agreed and said because he left so abruptly, he was fired. About a week later, he was back. Yes, I took him back because with dementia, making changes can throw their world into a tailspin. I was hoping the caregiver would have been corrected by the agency, but no luck.

Does anyone else pay an agency for care..? What should be expected from them..?

So stressed...... Worried that it's just me and maybe I should have kept my mouth shut......... Is it just me...??

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I ccurently take care of my elderly grandmother who has dementia im 23 and took care of my mom who had cancer before her death in 2013. yesterday with gram started off liike it usually does i got up made her breakfast and we sat around for a bit, then i had to take her to the bank to cash a check that she gets monthly. We went for a little ride on the backroads and went home she asked for ice cream and i fixed her a bowl which she ate. I was feeling dizzy and had a migraine building so i laid down on the couch and gram came in the room and sat down as well.
It was shortly after tthat everything went to hell in a handbasket.
I must have started to doze a little because i heard her get up persumably to go to the bathroom ,when i heard the back door and screen door open, i was instantly off the couch and getting my slip on shoes on snd gave chase. Because gram waas trying to leave off our back deck which has steep steps. Not wanting her to take a header off the deck i grabbed ahold of her coat to pull her back away from the steps. She promptly lost her shit, started yelling for help wheen i tried to get her back in the house i begged her to stop yelling and she procedded to try to break my hand all the while still screaming for help i told her she was hurting me and she said she wanted to hurt me and wrapped a hand around my neck and tried to push ME down the steps. I was by myself because my dad had needed to take one of our cars to the dealer to get it fixed. thank fucking god my neighbor was home she came running over and tried to diffuse the situation which was unsuccessful. an gram booked it to the road and tried to flag down a passing car by standing in the middle of the road , needless to say the frigging cops were called i nearly had a panic attack on the way to the dealer to go fetch my father and I couldn't sleep last night because of nightmares the look in her eyes when she came after me and tried to strangle me will haunt me for the rest of my life, I love my grandma but she was actively trying to kill me and don't had my neighbor not shown up she might have succeded.
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This is all to common. I am a professional Home care aide. I am increasingly frustrated with neglectful colleges. I am working on a bill for stricter standards for home care givers. Things to look out for lazy documentation or no documentation. CHECK References. But be aware, it is easy to lie in this business and have friends give references, Go with your gut, Never ever allow the aide to lie or get away with neglectful care, always have apps on hand for new caregivers. At this point there are no laws to govern care aides or families
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Also make sure the agencies are licensed by the state and they are willing to provide references that are approved by places like your Local Counsel on Aging. The better business bureau and the state Attorney General's Office is also a good souce for checking on agencies. Private is a hit or miss.
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We have had two paid caregivers for our parent, both thru a large national agency. Over several months time we went from the "honeymoon" where parent was ecstatic over having this nice lady come over, to increasing suspicion as the lady would "gift" handmade items....leading parent to feel obligated to pay for them; the lady would suggest expensive places to go out for lunch (versus fixing a sandwich at home); and finally bad-mouthing me to our parent, because I complained to the care coordinator about the lady. The next caregiver was not much better.
We have since found a private person, who was someone in our neighborhood and friend-of-a-friend, who is much better; no they are not background checked or received formal training, but for what our parent needs, they are reliable, and do not try to talk into expensive lunches, sell them things or bad-mouth me.
So my advice is, whether going thru a large chain or local person, be sure to keep tabs on their activities every single visit, and consider leaving a hidden voice recorder device (which was very revealing).
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We deal with a small local agency and they are great. Check out several and then try them out, I avoided the bigger ones on a hunch. In fact my parents love their gal so much I would love to hire her full time as a housekeeper, but there is a $2000. fee if I do... She comes for 5 hours on the days I work and would do so much if Mom would let her. Our only problem is bad weather!
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Bermuda, no, he is done and so is his agency.. He left for about a week and came back, but that was a few months ago..
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And no it's not just you, you are expecting them to provide the care that they are being paid for. That's not crazy. I know it might be hard on your father to experience changes in caregivers but not getting the care he needs long-term is bad too.
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Bunny, am I reading this right that you have taken the same caregiver back and he's now taking care of your father? Please consider firing him and that agency! You have more than enough cause. I had a very unpleasant experience with a home health agency misrepresenting what services they were willing to provide. Once it's clear that they are not honorable, cut them loose! It is more work to hire an individual and do the criminal and reference checks yourself, but it is possible to do so. Unfortunately as I discovered this year (and as you seem to have also) hiring an agency does not automatically protect you and your loved one from problems. Also if there are other agencies in your city you could try them out also.
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