Believing caregivers, how do I reconcile that scripture says to put others before me whereas the secular world says put me first?

Asking for prayers.
We are heading out of town, DH uncle in ICU, Dr. Say nothing else they can do for him. Praying for the healing hands if the Almighty to touch him. Please pray for him, his name is Gary. And for our safe travels.
Thank you family.
Much love and prayers for you all.

1 Corinthians 10:13


" No temptation has overtaken you except what is common to mankind. And God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you can endure it."

And be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ's sake hath forgiven you.
Ephesians 4:32

Philippians 4:13


" I can do all this through him who gives me strength."

The righteous shall be glad in the LORD, and shall trust in him; and all the upright in heart shall glory.

Psalms 64:10

Smeshque: You're welcome! I am so sorry that you are struggling on some Saturdays. I will lift you up in prayer, dear lady. Caregiving is often quite a load to carry, but you do it for your dear mother-just as she cared for you as a child.

Thank you for the poem and verse LL.

Today was another rough one, but I managed to hold back most of my tear moments. Thank the Lord. I don't know what it is about Saturdays, but it seems like the rest of the goings on of the week all catch up to me on Saturday. I always seem to struggle most on those days. But, anyway I know I am not the only one struggling as most of you have yours too. So I am just praying for us all the strength and courage that we need to do our best at what lies ahead of us. Love to you all.


“But let him ask in faith, nothing wavering. For he that wavereth is like a wave of the sea driven with the wind and tossed.” 
James 1:6

James 1:17

"Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of the heavenly lights, who does not change like shifting shadows."

A Prayer for the Caregiver
by Bruce McIntyre
Unknown and often unnoticed, you are a hero nonetheless.
For your love, sacrificial, is God at his best.
You walk by faith in the darkness of the great unknown,
And your courage, even in weakness, gives life to your beloved.
You hold shaking hands and provide the ultimate care:
Your presence, the knowing, that you are simply there.
You rise to face the giant of disease and despair,
It is your finest hour, though you may be unaware.
You are resilient, amazing, and beauty unexcelled,
You are the caregiver and you have done well!

Romans 8:18
For I reckon that the sufferings of this present time are not worthy to be compared with the glory which shall be revealed in us.

Smeshque: Your DH's story was so beautiful. Thank you for posting it.

Gershun: I agree about discussing scripture and that arguing about it should not be a part of it. We're here to lift each other up, in God's Holy name. Amen.

Finally,brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report; if there be any virtue, and if there be any praise, think on these things.

Philippians 4:8

Isaiah 40:30-31


" 30 Even youths grow tired and weary, and young men stumble and fall; 31 but those who hope in the LORD will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint."

The number of comments is outstanding. And all the Bible verses are very helpful. Yes, the job is tough. Having patience is hard sometimes, ....lots of times. Remember this is" Just a season of your life" not forever. That helps me put it in perspective. And I pray every day. And my pastor once told me to think of my loved one as if they "were Jesus". How joyful would u be to care for Jesus! I would feel it was an honor.

My DH read me this story and I thought it was so neat. I just wanted to share it.

A few years ago, I moved to a window office at work and sent an email around letting everyone know I had relocated. In the email, I jokingly invited everyone to come by for a “tour” of the new space and apologized that I didn’t have any hors d’oeuvres for my guests.
Well, I didn’t have hors d’oeuvres yet.
I was in a meeting that morning and when I got back to my office, there was a box of Dunkin’ Donuts on my desk. There was a note on it that was written in all caps and said, “Happy new office!” The person didn’t sign it or leave clues about who they were. I was so grateful for that.I didn’t feel like I owed anyone or that someone was trying to get something from me. In fact, I found myself attributing all the goodwill to everyone in the office. It was such a contrast to what I did on the beach a couple of weeks before that.
The tide was steadily coming in, and on the shore, there were two nice beach chairs that were about to be taken out by the waves. The owners were nowhere to be seen, so I moved the chairs again and again as the tide rose. When the couple who owned the chairs finally showed up, I couldn’t help myself. I went over, pointed to the crashing waves, and said, “A couple of hours ago, your chairs were out there.”
Oh, thanks so much for pulling them in,” said the guy. “We just realized they were out here and figured they had probably gotten washed away.”
“Don’t worry about it,” I said, as I walked away. Then these words came to my mind: “You have your reward.”
Jesus said, “When you give to someone in need, don’t do as the hypocrites do – blowing trumpets in the ... streets to call attention to their acts of charity! I tell you the truth, they have received all the reward they will ever get” (Matthew 6:2).
Beware of anyone who lets you know what they did for you, and beware of any desire in you to let others know what you’ve done for them. People who “blow trumpets” to announce their good deeds are looking for a reward and they resent those who don’t celebrate their faux generosity.
So, for example, when I went over to the couple on the beach, I was looking for affirmation. If the guy would’ve shrugged his shoulders after I announced my magnanimous deed of chair moving, it would’ve bothered me. It wasn’t enough to let the man wonder who it was — or worse — not even realize it had been done.
When someone gives anonymously, there’s total freedom. Nobody owes anybody else; nobody’s trying to manipulate; nobody has an agenda. They’re just giving for the sake of communicating an invaluable message: “You’re loved. Somebody cares about you. You’re important to someone and it has nothing to do with what you can give in return.”
When we experience the pleasure of giving anonymously, we do more than show kindness: We leave the recipient with the holy mystery of who cares for them so much. And in doing so, we increase the likelihood that they will direct their gratitude towards God, who deserves the credit anyway.

Joshua Rogers

I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me. Philippians 4:13. I have that verse hanging on my fridge

Proverbs 31:30

"Charm is deceitful, and beauty is vain, but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised."

Romans 5:1-5

Therefore, since we have been justified through faith, we[a] have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ, 2 through whom we have gained access by faith into this grace in which we now stand. And we[b]boast in the hope of the glory of God. 3 Not only so, but we[c] also glory in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; 4 perseverance, character; and character, hope. 5 And hope does not put us to shame, because God’s love has been poured out into our hearts through the Holy Spirit, who has been given to us.

Gershun & smeshque: Thank you for that good analogy.

Salutem: Yes, sorry for any misunderstanding. Love God first, TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF and then you're able to take care of others.

Wow. 711 comments! I think the other answers have covered it. I'm not 'scriptural' but you know when you get on the plane, and they say make sure you have your oxygen on before you help anyone else? Same thing goes with caregiving. A burned out caregiver is not good for themselves OR their LO.

Ephesians 4: 2-6

I think it all boils down to we are one spirit under God and if part of that one spirit does not love itself then it drags the whole spirit down. Remember we are a mirror to others. I don't know my scripture like some of you all do but I know enough of it to know that.

Plus, discussing scripture is great. We should do more of that. Arguing about it, not so much......................

The Bible doesn't mention self love? Where did I get the idea that it says ," Love your neighbor as you love yourself?" It doesn't say, "Love your neighbor but don't love yourself" If your version does, then you need to pick up a new book

You've misunderstood me. Love God, love yourself, then love others. If you don't love yourself, you can't love others. Take care of yourself.

salutem: Self love is not in the teachings of the bible. Self love puts you on a higher platform than God, which is not good. Love God first and then and only then can you like who you are as a mortal being.

Salute- thank you for your comment.
I agree that without love we are nothing. 1 Corinthians 13.
But I do not agree that loving others, comes from loving oneself first.
I would have to say that it comes from loving God first, for God is Love.

And As Cmagnum- pointed out, we love because HE first loved us.

Absolutely.

cmag - I agree we love because He loved us first, and to be able to love ourselves and others we must first accept the love God has for us.

I thought first John said that we love because God first loved us?