I feel really bad that I wanted to be free of taking care of this 81 year old living with me that I let her son take her.

Follow
Share

I feel really bad that I wanted to be free of taking care of this 81 yr old living with me that I let her son take her because he needed her credit and income to get apt.. when he came to move her he was horrible to her, yelling at her and wouldn't take all her stuff, the program I worked so hard to get her in for home care he refuses to let in apt. The girl who was coming 3 days a week text me and said he is very mean. Won't let her in so she just takes her on errands 1 day a week, should I report him?stay out of it? I do not want the responsibility of caring for her again and she needs gauranteer or cosigner for A.L. don't want her in boarding home or places that I've heard are bad. Do I just stop worrying and be happy I have my home and life back or do something, none of her kids care, they wouldn't help with her here and they don't talk to each other.. the woman stoled from me, I caught her 3 times, I cant have her here, I'm back n forth between not my business anymore and shame on me I should call someone but who? You all helped me so much before and I followed your advice and moved her out, which would be great if I knew she was being cared for and not knowing hes yelling at her, calling her names .. she was crying the day he took her because he was yelling at her the whole time calling her liar and things, what do i do?? Is this because she isn't a good person and what comes around goes around because she really did bad things why I was waiting on her hand n foot, let her drug attic sons in my home when I was gone and stole jewelry, medication etc.. and they still bring her $$ for my things .. to long a story but caught her because she gave things to people and I seen it, asked and was told it was from her..and I set her up.. she lies has no remorse and never admits anything.. I was a fool, but does she deserve to be abused?? I'm so torn.. any advice!!??

This discussion has been closed for comment. Start a New Discussion.
5

Comments

Show:
Well I reported the abuse to the manager of the senior apts she lives in and there regional manager. I dont talk to her anymore because she lies to much, I will never take on caregiving unless it is my family, anyone who does this job alone is a beautiful soul, I admire all of you and will keep up with your stories, So i wont get conned again, It is sad because i do believe there are good needy people in the world , as for me i will keep what i have left for mine . I was taken advantage of, stolen from and used by a senior. So be careful everyone. I should of taken the advice you gave me when i first joined this group.
(0)
Report

I recall reading a very similar thread but can't find it and it's not reflected in your answer section. In that situation, a woman had been caring for another woman, son lived across the street (I think), and the poster wanted to have the older woman's family step up to the plate and assume responsibility for care.

If this was your thread, you were concerned at that time and obviously still are concerned for this woman's welfare and are torn between whether to step back or become involved only in ensuring that she's cared for. At this point, you're no longer in the picture, but still are concerned. so I would contact APS and ask them to step in for an evaluation and assessment.

That way you've satisfied your concern in the most appropriate way possible, but you're also excusing yourself from direct responsibility. If you don't contact APS, you may still harbor concerns that you haven't done all you can to alert authorities to an abusive situation.

It's very kind for you to be concerned, and unfortunate that this woman abused your compassion. Perhaps there's more involved in her family situation and dynamics than you're aware of and that's why her son mistreats her, although that's not any excuse at all.

Be sure though that neither the woman, her son or other family members play on your sympathy and try to drag you back into the family feuds.
(4)
Report

Kindheart13, you did your best, she turned on you, she is no longer your responsibility, let kt go, and resume your life, let her family take care of her noe. They will soon find a rhythm, or she will end up in a Senior facility. No longer your problem. You did your BEST! Know that and let it go, all of it! Merry Christmas! Resume enjoying your own home and life again!
(3)
Report

I do feel as though i should report it, and whatever happens is beyond my control, thank you.. sometimes u need someone who is looking from outside in.. she will probably lie but the nurse and others seen n heard him doing it..
(1)
Report

You can call APS and ask them to check out her current living situation. If she chooses to stick up for her deadbeat son, to lie and manipulate the facts, then that is her prerogative, and you have done all you can do.
(6)
Report

This discussion has been closed for comment. Start a New Discussion.
Related
Questions