Mother in a Memory Care Unit operated by one of the largest retirement community companies in the US. Only 12 residents. I have a moral as well as a fidicuary responsiblity as her attorney in fact. A violent male moved into the community of which 10 are women. He is sexually harassing, intimidating the females and causing disruptions by physically attacking the resident assistants in the unit. His demanor is mean spirited and obnoxious. Most of the ladies are not high functioning but 3 are and the rest of the ladies are feeding off their stress and anxiety. My mother has been refusing to eat, take her showers, crying and thinks she has done something she is being punished for and that the food they are feeding her is poison. Her disease has not made her paranoid so far.

I took her out of the unit to calm her down for the day and she ate fine and relaxed and even laughed and joked with me.

I have made my concerns for her safety to the facility. There rooms are not secure and he wanders in at night on the ladies and scares them to death.

It is my understanding that violent patients are mixed with non violent and you have to take your chances. They are having him monitored by a private care giver from 8 AM til 8 PM to monitor behavoir and his physician is involved.

This is not what I expected that my mothers safety would be disregarded and she could be raped, beaten or killed by another resident. Has anyone dealt with a similar situation. And are there facilities in the US that offer segreated units that do not allow men and women be mixed? Any information would be helpful.

I can only protect my mother as far as society and the government allows. Is there a national lobby group that might work to force segregated Alzheimer Units for men and women?

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I would meet with the director and discuss concerns. Perhaps they can equip his room with a monitor or device such that when HE leaves his room at night, someone is alerted and can check on his whereabouts and return him to his room.

I would be asking for the facility OMBUDSMAN and I would videotape the attack. Pictures don't lie. NOW if you have not seen him do this, but are relaying stories from other patients, please consider that dementia patients tend to embellish the facts. For example, you know no one is poisoning her. If 3 or 4 women are sharing a delusion, it can grow into a scenario worthy of Stephen King.

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