Well..after about a week, and getting the speech therapist involved, we concluded that Mom does want the surgery.
The bone spurs are impinging on moms spinal cord...doing nothing will leave her not just in pain..but finally paralyzed.
So.. now I want to understand the risks. Mom has afib, arrhythmia, and a non-operable hole between the chambers of her heart. All of this seems to be well controlled.
I did some research and discovered that a study done of 80+ year olds with this surgery had no impact on mortality rates at 5 year post-op, .but found pain abatement near 90% at 6 weeks post op.
But, of course...this was without this complication of heart trouble too.
Mom clearly understands the issue now. I feel I need to proceed with scheduling the appointments leading up to surgery...just wish I knew more about the risk of doing it..I understand the risk of not doing it. Mom is clear that the risk of paralysis is not a risk she wants to take. She has had this surgery before..about 8 years ago. Starting about 2 years ago she was back on daily narcotic painkillers. Now it has reach the point of needing it again.