Since we can all use some good news and cheering up, I wanted to share something nice that happened to me yesterday.
First some background. My father is 93 years old and has had Alzheimer's for at least 15 years during which I have been his caregiver with no help from any family members (as most of us seem to be, sadly). He stayed at his home for as long as possible with help from me (I was still working full time and lived 2 hours away) and paid in home care. In 2011 I had to move him to a memory care facility where he lived until last year when he had a sharp decline and was on hospice for 6 months. He was taken off hospice because he did not continue to decline further. He is in a wheelchair fulltime, no longer speaks and is in the final stage of his life. Needless to say all this care has cost a fortune and has eaten up all his assets even though we were a strong middle class family.
The good news-
He is now in a small residential board and care home which has been wonderful to us, much better care and more affordable than the large memory care facility, Three caregivers and six residents. When I explained to them that my father's remaining assets are at an end and all he has is Social Security and a small Aid and Attendance pension form the VA, they told me not to worry (which I have been, A LOT). They are going to reduce his rent so that it will be covered by just his SocSec and VA pension. They are a Filipino family and I am so grateful for their kindness to my father and to me. The previous large memory care just kept raising his fees (even when he was in hospice and did not require as much care from their staff) and had a much lower staff to resident ratio, so his care was sub-par after he took a downturn. Money was their primary concern.
So my suggestion is to check out smaller assisted living places first if they are appropriate for your loved ones. At least mine is much more willing to work with you and limited funds than the larger ones where care is not as good when people need it most at the end of their lives.
Thanks for listening and good luck with your families.