Just need to vent. You all don’t need to read or comment. I understand.
Late this morning, my Christmas “celebration” was unceremoniously dumped into the trash bin. I got a few texts from my kids that pretty much made any plans I’d made pretty much worthless.
I've been setting aside a few bucks here and there for a few months, since I went back to work, so I could invite my kids and their families over for Christmas Eve. I haven’t done so for two years since my mom passed and our finances got so bad. I was going to pick my oldest grandson up on Saturday and we were going to shop, cook and decorate the house, something else I haven’t done in two years. I texted the kids and told them to be here at 3:30 since my daughter originally said she was working until 3.
My son texted back and said that he was invited over to his in-laws. He has not ever gotten along with them and they have finally invited him over with their daughter and our new grandson. I’m happy for him but he has thrown me and our Christmas Eve under the bus. He said he would make the 45 minute trip here to spend an hour here and then rush back to head to his in-laws. I told him not to bother. My daughter said she was now scheduled to work until “5 or 5:30”. She said my son-in-law and my other grandsons would come over at 3 but she wouldn’t be here until 6 or later. With nighttime preparations for hubby, by the time we socialized, ate, the kids opened their gifts and they left, I wouldn’t have hubby ready until after midnight.
Our family Christmas get-together has been completely trashed. I’m sure the kids don’t realize how hurt I am. I will be accused of being unreasonable. I am being “fit in” because they apparently have better things to do even though we’ve had these plans for 6 weeks. I had mentioned them coming over the 30th but I’m cancelling out on that. I will UPS the kids’ gifts to them. Hubby and I will most likely have Chunky Soup for Christmas Dinner.
This truly sucks. .
You’re right. I am changing my mindset. I’m tired of being treated like a minor inconvenience by them. Forget the respect I had for my mother and mother in law. I would NEVER have treated them like this.
I was always and still am, I guess, the understanding one. But there r times I wish I could say "I am disappointed". Not the one who needs to "suck it up" or be the "better person".
Decorate for you. Have a nice dinner, for you. I'm having Lasagna. Make a nice Christmas Day for hubby.
Basically, a lot of people have stated that the expectations of Christmas are what ruins it for them every year. I'm sorry that you are disappointed but people change their minds, traditions change, people change so you have to change your mindset too. It sucks, but that's life.
Its only taken me 57 years to finally realize that I just have to do me and let everyone else do them and try to meet somewhere in the middle.
You can enjoy time with hubby.