Elderly mom I care for still wants to go to orthopedic doc in December for her right arm, shoulder pain.

My friend who got Covid went to the doctor on Tuesday.

I will not put my life at risk.

Elderly mom has zero concept of Covid. Wants me to call my brother to take her to doc appointment.

He hasn’t called her in one and a half years since I got a restraining order against him....

The daily trials.......

This discussion has been closed for comment. Start a New Discussion.
Personally, I told NH not to take LO on any more appointments with outside practitioners - unless there's some urgency and something specific being sought.    My LO has never had much sense of responsibility to herself or others, so it follows that she doesn't care about covid exposure or taking covid back to the NH and infecting others.   She likes to go see doctors about her various ailments and thrives on the attention - this has been true for many, many years.  Most of her complaints are things that can be managed, but not solved.  She does not understand this and feels she should still have the mind and body of a 20 year old - if only she can find the right doctor who "knows what he's doing."  Right.    She finally wore them down at the facility and they started taking her to outside appointments.  Fairly legit reasons initially, but my LO's reasons are getting flimsy and she does not need to venture out during a pandemic to investigate the groin pain that she's had for at least a decade and everyone already knows about it.   She likes to go places in the facility's van and really doesn't care about risks to self or others.  Consequences?  She just blames someone else!

i heard you concerns. Bless your heart for taking care of mom. Care givers deserve a gold medal.
Risk vs Benefits.
COVID vs tolerable pain?
I agree with you! Elderly parents should stay away from not safe places like ER and doctor’s offices if possible.
You are again right! Our ICU is slowly filling up with COVID cases. I don't know in your area.
Pray for more wisdom and guidance. Hugs and prayer.

Covid is here to stay, and we will get vaccines and about 40% of the population won't take it--the same % as doesn't get a flu shot.

I went into the Hospital Monday for a PetScan and Mammogram. I was careful, masked up and used the sanitizer, kept my distance. I felt totally safe.

We are doing all this things for the common good.

It IS sad when someone dies and they really had more good years. I just know that being panicky and frantic over COVID is pointless.

In my state, we've lost 417 people to COVID. 252 to car accidents and 617 to suicide.

I'm a lot more concerned about the suicide rate.

Yes, they'll have a vaccine available and after all the sturm und drang...only 60% of the population will avail themselves of it. That's about the % of people who get seasonal flu, and that kills people every year. You don't see headlines about that.

Having said all that--your mom can probably skip the shoulder appt until she feels safer.

Thanks for comments.
Was just getting feelers out.

I made the scented, rice, microwave pads, have plenty.

Have 3 different size heating pads, have used them all.

If you have watched the Covid charts, extreme spikes just this month.

Vermont has an increase of 408%.

New York, just under 200%.

We got a new doc in July, haven’t met him yet.
Telephone visit only, I have called his office 3 separate times since July, not one returned call.
Voice mail, “ Go to ER if serious”.

Aches and pains of an 88 year old.......

Life threatening????
Not in my book.

Sorry if it offends.
But, unless you are an adult child of a 1960 parent household, who put their needs ahead of their children, you will never understand the bitterness of this adult child who desires nothing more than to be done with the care of the aging constant, selfish complainer, who did not take care of their offspring.

Plus, had a second friend contact me today.
Her sister in law could not get a bed in a Medical Center in either Syracuse, NY or Burlington, Vt, so was sent to a less equipped hospital in Plattsburgh, NY and put on a respirator.
She died this morning.

In case you think it is safe in this country, WAKE UP.

Nowhere is safe.

Dr. Fauci spelled it out.
It is happening.

The doctor from Wuhan China , Dr. Wenliang warned the world in January 2019, he died in March 2019, he was only 34 years old.

GA is right.
There are specially shaped heating pads online for neck and shoulders that you plug in.

I once had a microwaveable heating pad with rice inside. The heated insides conform to the painful area, and that also will relieve the pain by increasing the circulation.

Arimethea, you may have posted on your mother's arm issues earlier so I apologize if I'm asking something that might be posted elsewhere.

Has she ever had treatment for that arm, and if so, what was the diagnosis?   Did she injure it?   Will a heating pad help?   That's been a go-to for me for years, and even though it doesn't eliminate discomfort, it does help.  

I get the herbal pads, containing geranium and cinnamon.   When they're heated, the aroma is sooo relaxing.  That's part of their benefit.  I also made a few pads with first frozen rice, then added cinnamon.     The rice needs to be frozen first to kill any insect seeds, such as those pesky little kitchen flies.

Three choices:
1) Decide to go.
2) Decide to not go, and reschedule.
3) Decide to put off the decision to a later time in December.

You can look up online, or ask here, the many ways to help ease the pain from shoulder and arm pain. Things to do (non-medication) prior to seeing the orthopedic doctor.

I am thinking,
+ Gentle massage
+Gentle stretching, (arm up in the air), under warm water in the shower = (moist heat).
+Placing a pillow under her arm to decrease the stress on her shoulder while sleeping (painful side facing up).
+Using a large gel-pack to ice the arm and shoulder to decrease pain. Use at bedtime.

+Order a shoulder brace online from Amazon.
+Wrap the area with special tape, instructions online. Called "Rock tape", or
"K-tape". Helps support movement that may damage the joints, ligaments, muscles etc.

Did she fall, or injure the shoulder? Does she have arthritis?

Two things you need to continue doing... doctor visits and dentist visits. Addressing medical symptoms cannot be ignored. I've been to my PCP, my dentist, and my barber. I have an appointment with my optomotrist and for my colonoscopy (can't wait to try to chug down a keg of Golytely). Some things shouldn't be put on hold. Take precautions and make your appointment.

I too went to the Kaiser office on Tuesday for a CT scan. And my DH had open heart surgery in the hospital in the middle of a pandemic, and today, he had surgery AGAIN for a pleural effusion. We've both been in and out of doctor's offices and hospitals for the past 3 months, literally, and neither one of us has gotten the virus. If we hadn't gotten the medical attention that was required, he'd definitely be dead by now.

If you're that worried, get both of you N95 masks and go about your lives. Neither DH nor I have N95's by the way, we just wear either cloth masks or the yellow medical grade ones.

Don't stop living your lives or the virus wins, one way or another.

I'm sure your mom's orthopedic Dr, now has virtual visits since Covid, so that's always an option if that makes you feel any better.

Also just because someone might test positive for Covid, doesn't mean that they're going to show any symptoms, and even if they do, the recovery rate is much higher than the death rate. It's very sad to me how many people have stopped living their lives just because of Covid. The untold damage it's doing to people all over the world, who chose to live in fear, instead of just using common sense breaks my heart. Best wishes to you and your mom.

This discussion has been closed for comment. Start a New Discussion.
Start a Discussion
Subscribe to
Our Newsletter