Marlis Powers
Caregiver for husband with dementia, writer
Marlis describes herself as a “Gramma who loves technology and has a lot to say.” She blogs about whatever catches her interest: food, books, family and more. For AgingCare.com, she writes about the issues facing the elderly and her experiences caring for her husband, Charlie, who suffers from dementia.
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Recently, things have been slipping out of my mouth that are better left unsaid. I am asking myself if we all lose our filter as we age—the filter that keeps hurtful things from coming out at unexpected times.
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I was trying to cope with all of the horrible things that had happened and Charlie’s lack of compassion wasn’t helping. I am starting to suspect he is losing his empathy along with his mind.
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A personal story about the struggles of adjusting to the changes in daily life while caring for a loved one with dementia.
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I don’t resent Charlie for his lack of empathy. It’s just one more thing I have to face as a dementia caregiver. When he isn’t himself I just try to remember the man he used to be, the man I fell in love with.
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I, like most caregivers, need a sounding board to let off steam. It's either sound off to some anonymous computer screen or sound off to our loved ones. I choose the computer, and you, as the lesser of two evils.
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At age seventy-seven, I had a knee replacement. I am using every tool available to assure that I keep my teeth. Now, I am on the hunt for a hearing aid(s).
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Charlie has had several falls in the past few months. One way to prevent falls is to do strength training exercises, but Charlie won't go to the classes any more. Do I fight with him daily?
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I'm sure you've heard that soldiers in the field resist becoming close to their buddies, the reason being that they either rotate out or worse, become KIA's. Living in a 55+ community has the same pitfalls.
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A caregiver’s story: I recently found out the hard way that a vacation with a dementia patient isn’t much of a vacation after all.
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Many dementia patients reach a point where they can't separate fact from fiction.
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Not all VA hospitals are created equal, but we are fortunate enough to live within 15 minutes of a top-notch facility.
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Charlie has resumed one of the unhealthy habits he first picked up during his days as a fighter pilot. With dementia, there is so little left that gives him any pleasure.
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Caring for my husband with dementia presents almost daily challenges. Charlie's latest hygiene habit is as perplexing as it is frustrating.
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Since I was diagnosed with IBS, I have had to seriously limit my travel and avoid certain activities. I never know when another episode is going to hit…
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It was a September day in 2008 when my husband and I began our trip down dementia's ever-darkening road.
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The combination of Charlie's war injuries and dementia mean he can't explore the outdoors like he used to, but there are ways he's been able to maintain his connection with the wildlife in our community.
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Charlie doesn't want to go to the doctor anymore and he refuses to do his rehab. When is it time to stop medical intervention and just try to make our loved ones are as happy and comfortable as possible?
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The holiday season is always stressful, but when you add caregiving to the mix, the season for love and sharing can become almost too much to handle. Here's how Charlie and I cope.
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Caregivers, be aware of how and where you store medications in your home and around those with Alzheimer's disease and other forms of dementia. My husband Charlie recently gave me a fright when he found a bottle of my Advil PM.
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Charlie used to be a gadget guru, capable of fixing anything. Now, because of his dementia, I have to explain to him how to turn off the TV every night.