Please call you local hospice and get their help. They will help you through this with support for you and your husband. You shouldn't be handling this alone. They have counseling for families as well as the person dying. Take care of yourself, Carol
This sounds selfesh, but I know what your going through! You are #1 right now and need to focus on yourself.The man above will take care of your husband. BELEIVE! Although I'm not a church going citizen it helped me. Lots of Hugs your way Yellowbird
My mother-in-law died yesterday Dec 30, 2010. I was her full time caregiver. The hospice people gave me a book called "GONE FROM MY SIGHT", 'The Dying Experience' It gives you info on what to expect in the last 1 to 3 months, then the last 1 to 2 weeks, then the last 1 to 2 days to hours prior to death. You can also type the dying experience in google and read what to expect but if you have the book you can easliy check whats going on. The timeline is right on and will help you be prepared.
i very much am in agreement with Carol--When it comes to "end of life" the people at Hospice know what is necessary to put the patient in some sort of comfort-as well as the family involved. Plus they offer support on all levels, in addition to counceling. I truley do not know-when I lost a family member, what I would have done without them. Speak with your physician, and have Hospice brought into the picture..a/s/a/p Peace be with you during this trying time. Hap
I too recommend hospice, but do research first. When my Mom passed away, the hospice we used was awful. She lay on the hospice room floor overnight, and when they brought her home all bruised the next day it was to die, although we weren't given any information about it and didn't know what was going on. Also, she suffered all day because her meds didn't get there until late that evening. My Dad was in Compassionate Care Hospice before he passed Dec. 16, and they were wonderful and caring, and kept us fully informed and made sure he and we were comfortable right up to the end. Please, look into it, because the right hospice can be a godsend. I wish you all the best.
About what you are experiencing now and then some. Worry confusion, denial, guilt, anger, fear, hope, loss. As for physical things it really depends, hopefully you can find some support in your area and loved ones to help so you are not alone. This too shall pass, but along the way it is a lonely scary touching time. I was with my grandmother when she died, I slept by her on the floor our hospice came daily to check and when she was gone they handles all the details. I know this is not the time you will think of doing business and so forth but ask a few people you trust and any Dr or Health agencies that can assist you, if it feels right go with it. Give yourself some time to adjust, don't feel you have to be perfect or rush just do what you can and ask for help when you need it and before you need it...Peace to you and your husband.
hevnbnd: I am so sorry for your loss. Now you can pray for the repose of her soul ....remember the dead cannot pray for themselves. We have to do it. Hospice is a greart source of comfort and knowledge in the final months of a patient's life. I didn't know that they published such detailed information. I'll remember that. We all should.
I was trying to help by responding to familyties10 but, I want to "THANK YOU all" for the thoughts and prayers in reguard to my loss. GOD sustained me throughout my caregiver journey. My prayers are with you all as caregivers, my sister put it this way, "God gave her the best earthly angels he could and now the heavenly angels will take over."
Dear hevnbnd, I can relate to your feelings... You keep thinking your loved one needs you, and then remember that she won't need you again... Now is time to take care of you!!! Rest and eat healthy and KNOW that what you did for her was precious and wonderful!!! take care, J
I know this is hard there are various things to watch for, breathing patterns change. Also very often their skin will mottle.. and this is an indication that time is close. Call hospice and let them help you. It is a medicare benefit and is really wonderful!!! take care and God bless...
I can say no more thans been said, hospice is the way to go , their booklets are through, and comforting, having them through my dad,s death, and now careing for my 92 year old mom, their booklets releives the questions of am i doing the right thing? hugs to you, carol, firstgirl
My grandmother passed yesterday August 22, 2012 and as the time came closer to leave us her body shut down everyday a little more. Her breathing became difficult, then her gag reflexes left. Her eyes became swollen and her vision became blurry. It was difficult to know that everyday it would be diffrent. But we as a family pulled together and when she decided to leave us she was not alone and was at peace.
Take care of yourself,
Carol
I truley do not know-when I lost a family member, what I would have done without them.
Speak with your physician, and have Hospice brought into the picture..a/s/a/p
Peace be with you during this trying time.
Hap
Hospice is a greart source of comfort and knowledge in the final months of a patient's life. I didn't know that they published such detailed information. I'll remember that. We all should.