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My mom is in a nursing home near where she lives. Her husband/my father died suddenly 2 weeks ago. My husband and I want to move her to a nursing home closer to us (she's in PA now, we want to move her to Georgia). She can't walk but she uses a wheelchair. She does get carsick but I'm hoping the doc can give her some medication for that. We want to make the trip in one 10-12 hour drive but neither my husband nor myself can do that long a drive in one day.

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Agree with many of the comments already posted above. Long trips are fatiguing for both the caregiver the driver and the patient. That is why we now offer not only air ambulance service (very expensive) but now long distance ground transportaton . We transport patients long distance from 300 to 3000 miles in a medically configured motor coach with 2 professional drivers with an experienced transport nurse. Patients ride in a hospital bed on a continuous air-flow therapeutice mattress (very important for all patients especially those with bedsores). An on-board bathroom eliminates transfes on and off the coach to use public restrooms. Fully medically equipped, the coach is outfitted with an oxygen concentrator ( up to 10 liters per minute) plus back up oxygen tanks, nubulizer, suction machine, feeding tubes plus a microwave for hot drinks and a blender/ food processor for special soft food diets. It is expensive but is much more comfortable than riding backwards in any 19-22" stretcher in a van or ambulance.
If you need free advice we are here to help you. Hope this is helpful information.
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I am sorry about the sudden loss of your dad.

I would give yourselves more time to do a trip that long. You also want to be aware of the potential of your mom developing pressure sores and blood clots from sitting too long. She needs to be able to shift her weight and do leg exercises while sitting in the car to help keep the blood circulating. It is also important to take frequent breaks (possibly every 2 or 3 hours) and make sure she is well hydrated. I would even seriously consider making it a two day trip and stop overnight somewhere at a hotel which has good handicap rooms.

We rented a get away handicap assessible mini van which had room up front to put the wheelchair on the passenger side because we could not get my mom in and out of the car anymore. She also had a reclining wheelchair which helped some, too.

You also need to know that transporting someone is very taxing on you. It is emotionally and physically draining. So definitely take care of yourself too. I wish you, your mom, and your husband the best.
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You don't want to fly?
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This shouldn't be too difficult if both you and your husband can spare the time to do this together and if Mom can sit in a wheelchair she should be able to tolerate a car ride. Get medication from Mom's physician to keep her tummy settled while traveling....and while you are there make sure you sign all the appropriate paperwork to have Mom's medical records changed to a new physician if you have one. Then split the drive time between the two of you, making short stops to stretch legs, potty breaks, meals, etc. While one is driving, the other is keeping an eye on Mom. She may sleep for the better part of the trip which will make it easier since she gets car sick. Good for you that you will have Mom close and I'm sure she will enjoy that also. Good luck!!!!
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Have you selected the new NH? The old or new NH should be able to help u plan according to her specific needs, perhaps the SW at old NH could be helpful here. U will want to coordinate notice (usually 30 days) and date MCare/MCaid pays-or long term care ins.-w/ move date. Most facilities won't refund any days, most payors won't duplicate payments. Good luck w the move, much better to have mom nearby, for both of you. It will be confusing to her, be prepared for that! Kimbee
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What a terrible idea!

Moving dementia patients out of a familiar environment invariably leads to decline.

Why ever would your mil want to move her mother BACK HOME? Has she got three shifts of caregivers lined up? Has grandma got the funds to do that.?

If this is a question of distance, better to get a geriatric care manager involved where grandma is to handle emergencies. The time to move grandma was when she was first diagnosed.
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Peymar401, my first question why was your Mom-in-law's mother placed in a nursing home to begin with, and how long has she been there? What other medical issues does Mom-in-law's Mom has beside memory?

Why does your Mom-in-law want to move her Mom back home? And like Babalou above had written, does she have at several shifts of professional caregivers lined up to help? Is her house set up like a nursing home? If not, and Mom isn't mobile, can Mom-in-law carry her from bed to bathroom, etc? With Alzheimer's there are different stages. Mom-in-law might find herself trying to live on 2 or 3 hours a sleep per day. I hope there is a really really good reason to make this move.
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It took me over a year to finally get her here in AZ with me. She did not want to move. I hired 2 caregivers to fly up with me and take her out of NH. When we got to NH they were not prepared and did not have mom sedated so she would be more compliant. The NH she was previously in was horrible and took advantage of me living so far away. Anyway, I wound up paying the 2 caregivers to drive me and my mom back to AZ.....a 23 hour non stop drive. Mom currently doesn't remember the drive down here and thinks she is still close to Granite City, IL (where she lived for most of her adult life). If you would like to email me I will give you contact information for the people that helped me. Without them, mom would still be at that horrible nursing home. Best of luck to you.
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Recent memory of events is usually the first to be lost. Long term memory recall of events 10 years ago should make the transition easier than going to new surroundings. One never know for certain but I think it be the better choice to return to the previous environment than to new surroundings. Still some patients adjust very well even to the new setting. Just my opinion for what it's worth after 30 years of experience transporting patients.
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Since we transport patients long distance ( state to state ,cross country) almost every day, we often encounter patients with dementia. Often they do not even realize they are traveling to another location.From our experience as long as the patient is not fearful or frightened about traveling the trip is not difficult for the patient. Perhaps that is because a our medical coach is more like a home with a couch and full kitchen etc. plius the patient does not have to leave the coach to use the bathroom. The stress falls on the family member who must change the diapers, change the foley catheter, perhaps suction the patient, arrange oxygen if needed, turn the patient every 3-4 hours to prevent bed sores etc. As mentioned above some sedation in route often helps patients who become anxious. Sending facilities seldom give sedation because of liability issues which they cannot control once the patient leaves their facility. Hope these comments are helpful.
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