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I'd like to hear from others about that transition time of when their elders could walk, to when they couldn't anymore.

Within the next few months or one-year my dad will likely be there - I'm probably environment, assistance, financially prepared, but not emotionally. To be frank, how long was the "bedridden" period? Does it just vary all over the place? I think I'm more prepared to for the day he passes, rather than the days, weeks, months, years (?) just before.

The docs seem wholly unprepared with advice or info about this, but I think other caregivers will have plenty to share. Thanks "in advance."

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I can see by the expert answers that I know very little about truly caring for my mom in a skillful way. I am going to try everything you all have suggested. I'm printing out the answers, will watch the videos, try, try, try.........Thank you SO much!!!
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Ruthie- thanks for your postings. I have some expertise in mobility related products and have seen many new products at national tradeshows. If you want to discuss please get in touch. Wow- the original posting is from 2010 but the topic will be around forever.
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Also, I have going to talk from both sides of my experience at once ....patient perspective:....keep it simple....sometimes, skipping the pants is OK. seriously. nobody and i do mean nobody pays attention to what people in wheelchairs are wearing. They see the wheelchair. a dress will be just fine, even if its "au natural" underneath. use lots of padding if needed. or a disposable. I think, for me, it helps prevent uti's also but there is no science behind that other than personal experience. using a size larger to make dressing easier is OK also.

When i was working, and spent most of my day lifting people and pushing wheelchairs around out in the world and assisting people with transfers, I personally found it easier to lock the WC, get someones bum pointed in the right direction, and let gravity, GENTLY help us. do NOT twist and turn, as that will hurt. As far as doing a single person lift...If I HAD to do a single person lift, and the person could not participate, lift them from behind, and have my back near a wall so if i was going to fall, we could slide down that rather than crash. .

It's also OK to sit front wards on the potty. Sometimes transfering directly from the potty to the shower is easier, and there are ALSO transfer chairs that fit in a shower that have a potty already installed......a one stop shop. one transfer, they can "go" the bucket can be removed there are wheels that can be wheeled into the shower, (or it can stay in the shower, as circumstances warrant) and this self same chair can be used as a "drying station and dressing station" before transfer back to bed or WC. also works as a transport chair. available online. under shower chairs. These are some other options.
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if you use a transfer board the two things need to be level height so no sliding....
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There are also mechanics weight belts that can be bought at a good hardware store that can go around your back that will help save your back. make sure to use body mechanics and try to do a two person lift whenever you can. There are excellent videos on you tube how to lift and transfer. best of luck to you
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Can she sit up? there is a thing called a transfer board. it's essentially a board that goes from one thing (the bed, for example) to the WC. and she can possibly be helped to slide from one thing to the next there are videos of how to safely do this on You tube. AlSO. there are GAIT BELTS. these go around her waist and you can hold them the handles that are affixed to the sides. If that is too complicated, there is a website that sells supplies to airplane pilots something like my pilot store and there is a very nice urinal on there that has a female attachment to where urine is diverted into a container. fabulous. no need to get out of the chair if it's just number one. just make sure and clean really really good. Pants..there are some with snaps or velcro on the side. OR it is possible to have the person in the bed, and roll them to pull the pants up...

It is easier to turn someone if they can raise their arm closest to you above their head, and have them roll toward you and put the pillow behind their back to support them. safer to have two people to help.

see also about getting a hoyer lift. it's a sling that she can safely be held in and lifted.
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How do I transfer my parent now that all use of legs is gone? My back hurts trying to lift her. She can no longer transfer to toilet or from wheelchair to bed or from bed to wheelchair or to commode. Dressing her is so difficult because she cannot stand for me to pull up her pants. She also has dementia. I have the problems that anitahouston sees with her mother taking care of her grandmother.
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carolbb technically, yes, an OT can help, but you need to find one who is certified to fit people for Wheelchairs and DME. check and see if your area has a Disability resource center. They can refer you to a person with the appropriate certification.
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the main thing is that it's sort of an emotional adjustment. It's NOT a lifestyle choice.....it's a Tool....like a hairbrush, or a drill....if this TOOL makes a TASK easier, or safer, then use it. Every now and then, there are MOMENTS when i can stand up and change the thermostat, or shut the blinds. I have learned, as my body declines, that I can choose where to put my energy...letting machines do the rroutine, rather boring work of carrying my body through the OR having the safety and energy to get out now and then and go to the movie or have a friend over for tea, or just sit in the garden and let the sun shine on my face and be alone. :)
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welcome. Just send me a message if you have any specific questions...Im sure there is more to talk about but i was trying to give a very very fast overview. I used to help train people to use chairs before I needed one myself so i have a perspective from both sides. Good luck to you.
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ruthieruth, thank you so much for taking the time to share this!
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Final thing....check out the "medical/sanitary" section at "the pilot store" there is a thing called a travel john (with female attachments) that might or might not be useful, as well as a deluxe portable urinal. for less than 25.00. :)
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I use a camel back bladder thing for drinking water....I find it much easier and then i can keep my decaf in the (cheap)_ aftermarket cup holder.......
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ALSO, check the spinal cord association of america for more wheelchair tips
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As a former caregiver...I got myself a professional back belt from a hardware store. I also got a transfer belt for the patient if they were bigger than me. Silk sheets help glide the patient from the bed to the other side of the bed so it's easier to slide them to the chair. look on you tube for safe transfer techniques...it's BEST to have two people doing the transfer, but there are ways to do a one person transfer. Having a strong rope tied to the footboard of a regualar bed can let the patient help lift themselves up. (professionals will gasp here, i am just talking real life).....also, there are ways to get up off the floor using a regular wood chair that both the patient and the caregiver should know.
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Simplicity patterns (i think) has a pattern for a hoyer lift sling
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I am not fifty yet and use a power wheelchair daily. almost 24/7. transitioned into it gradually, and have since lost the use of my hands and arms, concentration, and short term memory. Here are a few tips, from 20+ years of experience......

get a chair with the tightest turning radius you can find.....trust me on this...it will mean the difference in having to replace doors, and if needed, it is POSSIBLE to get a chair with a turning radius of 20" or less into a regular sized public bathroom stall.....(not closing the door, but that's what umbrella's and jackets are for.....). I can turn mine in a complete circle in a 20 x 20 inch square space.....this comes in handy at many many churches, btw.....most are exempt from complying with ADA regs, and while many are able to fit folks in, lots don't have room....

go ahead and cash pay the $66.00 (each) for the elevated leg rests if insurance denies (they will cover for edema, usually). They are outrageous, but so is that much spent on coffee at a coffee bar....and when having to sit all day, one really does need to be able to raise one's legs. Ditto with the head rest.

There is a WONDERFUL seat cushion called a roho, which is around 60.00....insurance pays if there is skin breakdown. Don't wait that long...it's MISERABLE. Amazon has a much much much cheaper.......under 20.00 knock off version called Cor-Flex medic-air seat cushion that does the same thing. It is possible to cut a hole in a tennis ball and put it on the joystick driver to make it easier to grab hold of. If you like to go outside, cover the heck out of it with reflective tape, and consider wearing a orange vest. Additionally, when it rains, it CAN be taken outside...as long as it's not storming, (although i have done that too...just cover everything, especially the controller, with lots of plastic.... Inside the house.....there are double hinged door hinges that can add two inches extra to door clearance. There are portable and adjustable ramps (amazon has some rubber ones) that can adjust to one, two, three, and four inch thresholds. There is a very helpful company spinlife and another, functional solutions, that have gadgets. I personally did not buy many of them other than ramps. There is one verzion of the jazzy chair that actually comes apart into eight pieces that fits into a trunk. loved that. The trick is to charge the batteries every night from a plug that belongs only to the WC. can be tricky if one also has oxygen.

In terms of what to expect every day, that changes over time. hard to say for each person. For me, it has meant more freedom in many ways....I live basically alone...my partner has dementia....in some ways, there is loss....folks in real life tend to expect less. Frustrating when one is barely 50. I keep a lot of my cooking things on the counter in my kitchen. Taking cabinet doors off means that i have more ability to get to stuff when i need to easier.

My bathroom is a regular apartment bathroom that I share with my partner who has a hip issue, so we have a raised toilet seat. prior to that, I put two grab bars on the wall behind the potty, parked in front of the potty, and sat facing the wall. easier for me. no room to pull in sideways and transfer. not a big deal. just make sure and power the chair off. LOL. transfer from the toilet to the tub. Get a shower chair that has a toilet in it. And I recommend a bariatric one, even though i weigh 120 pounds. They are just made better and last longer, imho.

There is a thing called a transfer board....google it, and if you are handy you can make your own....I did....that allows one to slide from a chair to a bed or a couch or a shower chair.....

There are clothes online (or if you like to sew you can modify existing clothes) that have snaps down the sides, so that dressing and undressing can be done from a seated position.

If you are helping someone in a seated position position put on a coat in a hurry.....like an evauation.....wrap a warm blanket around them in the back and put the coat on backwards.

a reacher is indispensible. Put a magnet on one end of it if you can only afford to buy one, and use metal silverware

I love to cook....I got myself a long rectangular card table and use that as a counter so i don't have to lower the counter in my apartment. works. So does a hot plate, a rice cooker, a crock pot, a combo toaster convection oven.

if you own your own house, the recomended adaptations suggest a side opening oven.....I know of a welder in someones house that did a switcheroo on some old stove and saved someone a lot of money. just sayin. it is safer.

one piece of technology that i love is the electronic thermostat, so i don't have to stand up to see the temperature in the house.

I tie a long rope on my front door and i can close it behind me just fine when i leave down the ramp....I have to go back up to lock it, but it's an older apartment....no worries, right. it's a classy neighborhood.

Get rid of the rugs. just do it.

tile is actually better.

wipe down the chair after every trip outside and at least once a week.

if you like to go shopping, get the stupid looking wire basket for the back. it cuts down the turning radius, but it comes off in the house, and it's easier to get to stuff from that than it is from the back pack

if you are dealing with hover round.....do not fall for the 349.00 upgrade of a reclining seatback ......get the doctor to order it, and decline on delivery.....then go to your tool box, get a pair of pliers and remove the COTTER PIN....and thank me....I paid for THAT education.....ping me if you have any more questions.......
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Why is it that a friend 79yrs old, fell because she couldn't get her legs to stop moving? What is the cause?
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As a primary caregiver, it is important that you prepare and plan for caring for a loved one who may eventually become immobile. No matter how light or heavy, caring for a person who is immobile can be very difficult and add to the daily stress. I was able to care for my mom who was 2 1/2 times my weight. The following is an outline of a few of the tools (hardware) I used to move my mom from place to place with dignity and mutual comfort. Wheelchairs can often be found at Goodwill for about $45.00. Check to make sure that the leg rests fit. The larger heavier wheelchairs are easier to navigate. The lighter models are easier to Iift but often harder to navigate. In terms of stair lifts, if you can follow a You Tube video and are willing to install a stair lift, Ameriglide provides self install stair lifts for less than $2,500 with used models as low as $1,800. The YouTube videos show a two hour instal. It took me 8 hours and found it challenging but do-able. A Hoyer style lift is important to be able to lift the person from the floor to the bed or from a bed to a chair. I found Hoyer Lifts on eBay ranging from $400+. Often slings have to be purchased separately. Moving a person from a bed to a chair, to Wheelchair to a car I found the Take Along Lift very helpful. This lift provides great back support, folds up, is very durable and has wheels. It easily fits in a car trunk. (There are illustrations on the website). These lifts run about $2,500. They sell an additional sling to lift a person from the floor to the bed/chair but I never used the sling as I had a Hoyer lift prior to getting the Take Along Lift. A bubble mattress that alternately inflates and deflates bubbles on the surface to alternate pressure is helpful to prevent bed sores. Bed mats are essential to change bed linens and should be layered under the patient. They are also helpful in turning the patient and keeping the bedding clean. Last but not least be careful of urinary track infections that can confuse matters and make a difficult situation harder to deal with. I hope this helps.
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Windyridge- good post- assistive products can be a huge help. Many caregivers put the person (and themselves) at risk of injury by just trying to do things manually. Or if that can't work just let the person stay in bed and decline further. Had a woman call us and say her husband spent 90% of his day in bed while she worked. He had mobility problems (and strength) but without help/hope it sounded like he was also depressed. With proper products he could have safely/independently got himself in/out of bed. Nothing happened- last I heard he was in hospital with severe weakness and other health issues. The old saying is true- "use it or lose it". As people age problems will occur- either something is done to address the problems (therapy, products, outside help) or do nothing as the person fades away.
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Taking care of an elder who is largely immobile is a huge job. Are you confident you can do this at home? If so, there are many small inexpensive aids that can help. A potty chair, not an extension or riser. A bed rail to help him get in and out of bed. Check out the type that slips in between the box spring and mattress and simply has small ladder rungs to grab onto. My mom loves hers. An electric lift chair works for many elders. Not cheap. 4 to 6 hundred. A therapist can visit and help you choose the best kind of walker and or wheel chair and also show you how to place grab handles were needed around the house. Check with the landlord. They may allow this with a security deposit to fix any screw holes later on. There is also an assortment of show and bath chairs available.
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My father is 89 and has post-polio syndrome. He had polio in his 20s, recovered well and led an active adult life (tennis and skiing) but since his 60s, he's been getting weaker and weaker. His legs are very weak now and he's falling down more and more. He lives in an independent living retirement home in 2-bedroom apartment with my mother. He uses a walker which is sort of a combo as it has a seat he can sit in once he uses it to as a walker to get somewhere but he still tries to walk and he has little strength. And what he has is not a self-propel wheel chair, it's more walker than wheel chair.... I wonder what you'd recommend in terms of transitioning him to something that was self-propelling but had the option of being used as a walker... Also, what kind of person could help him make this transition.. An occupational therapist? They live in a small city of 24,000 that has limited resources.. Appreciate any thoughts you have.
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Bookluvr, did they ever say why your mom quit walking so suddenly? That's so sad, but at least she wasn't wandering or chasing y'all anymore. I think wandering would be too much work for MIL, she has become quite comfortable "sitting", although she used to be on the move constantly, hardly being still at all. She's 92 though, and probably deserves a rest.

My grandmother lived in what I would describe as a semi-vegetative state for probably a decade. No feeding tube, she would eat pureed food and it took forever to feed her. She always said she was going to live to be 100 and she did, although I don't know that she realized it, maybe she did.
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My Mom has been using a Rollator for years. If we're going to be doing a lot walking, we also have a transport wheelchair. I think very soon she may be transitioning to the wheelchair most of the time. She has been spending more and more time in bed, and today took a shower and had to call for help. The week before my father died, one of his doctors (who was also my doctor) looked at me during one of my appointments and said, "Does it seem to you that your Dad is winding down?" At the time, I was shocked and angry, and told him so. He was right, and he was there with Dad and helped us through when he died. I wish he was here now (he moved his practice out of state) - I could use some of his bluntness now - that phrase "winding down" keeps coming into my head about Mom.
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I do volunteer work at a local hospital, thus I see a lot of visitors come and go.... I am amazed at the number of elders who use walkers instead of the Rollator.

Last week this very tall elderly man, who looked 100, was struggling with the walker which had wheels only on the front... I felt so sad for him because a Rollator would make life so much easier for him.

I bought my Dad a Rollator a couple of months ago, my gosh, you'd think I had bought him a Shelby Mustang, he was so happy with this new type of walker. Now he go everywhere and moves quicker than he has in years.
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She fell on 10-5,10-6 and 10-14, paramedics helped her back to bed the first two times, but the last time she was taken to hospital.
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I'm my Mom's sole caregiver. She goes from walker to wheelchair and back to walker. PT helps her get back going again and them something else puts a stop to her moving. She was diagnosed with Stage 3b lung cancer in June. Beginning of Oct. she was hospitalized with Pancreatitis , then mid Oct. for a stroke. This week for low oxygen levels. She's back home in wheel chair. Wondering how much longer she'll be mobile.
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My MIL now uses a cane in the house (the walker won't fit through the bathroom doors), the walker for going very short distances outside of the home (she feels more secure with the walker), but if we are doing any walking more than just a few steps, she uses a wheelchair which we push. She does spend more and more time in bed asleep. Her immediate problem is arthritis, but she does shuffle and have frozen feet like Parkinson's. Hopefully, being bedridden is still a ways away. Funny thing, we got her a Rollator, but she won't use it because it's for "old people".
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Bookluvr, that's awful. I feel sad for both her and yoru dad who obviously can't bear the thought of losing her.
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My mom was constantly walking, walking and walking (sundowning). In between that, she was chasing us because she wanted to hurt us (her violent stage). One day, she was walking. The next morning, she couldn't get off the bed. She became bedridden. She had a DNR form but my dad refused to honor it.

From walking to bedridden. Then problem swallowing - so choking on food/fluid. Then dad had the stomach G-tube put in so that he can feed her. She started choking on her own saliva (forgetting to swallow), so, she had a trache. She's been resuscitated several times. I would say it was a bit over 13 years when she became bedridden.
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