All the work I'm doing for my dad drives me crazy. When will it be enough?

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Everyday I say to myself I want to give up and let someone else do all the work. I promissed my mother I would take care of her husband and not put in a home. He has lied about so much and his health is deteriorating due to smoking and drinking. I stopped enabling him and he is still finding ways to get cigarettes. We go to doctor and he tells lies about his health and he doesnt smoke and how he cant see. I mostly just yes him to death tnd tell the doc the truth.
Im guessing doctors know elderly people dont tell the whole truth cause it seems like no big deal to them.
I cant stand that all the work i do to keep him healthy makes me crzy and then he can lie about stuff that is so petty, like he doesnt pick his nose and doesnt know why its bleeding. or I dont smoke. i have trouble seeing i hate the cold but i can go out side for freash air and throw other peoples half burned cigarette butss all over the drivway.
The latest is he has a shrapnel injury from vietnam. I got his dd-214 to try and get more benefits for him that states he was in a hospital in staten island for 3 years as a medic. No combat wound not even any time out of the united states.

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baba....yeah they can be mom is over the falsehoods and they get older a lot of this stuff goes away and then you have more physical disabilities to contend with as well as mental. Is he on any psych meds? (I am guessing not at this time)
yea he is on prozak!! I think i liked him better when he was drinking and smokin at least he had nothing to lie about!! He is my step father and for christmas he was with his sons family and they told me he was mean and ordering then to give him cigarettes and someone gave in so thats where he got them from. I should just pack his stuff and leave him on their doorstep
Wait a minute he is your stepfather and he has a son? Time to "share the responsibility". It is sad the way we take on so much and feel so guilty. I bet the son would put him in a home in a New York minute.
Im sure u r right madge. i try sharing the responsibility but now one wants to really help. my sister will take him for a few days once in a while but as soon as he gets there she is ready to send him home and his son sees him even less. When he is at his sons he complains that they dont turn the heat high enough. I get sick of how he thinks everyone should change the way they do things to make him happy and he duz nothing but make everyone miserable. Im not an angel but he needs to understand what i sacrifice to make him healthy and somewhat happy cuz nothing will make him happy old is I mentioned they tend to do this less and less as times goes on...glad I am over that hump of demands!
he is only 66 acts 90. the 4 strokes give him an excuse to act like he cant do anything but i know what he can do he is lazy he has had physical therapy and they say he is capable of alot more. i realize depression plays a role but he is a compulsive lier

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