What is the best and kindest way to take over all financial duties?


My father, who is 90, in the beginning stages of Alzheimer's, has begun to making too many ATM withdrawals & I fear he may be giving it away or someone else. How is the best way to approach him about my taking over the responsibility of the finances & suggest a weekly allowance for him?

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Do you or another family member have a POA? I hope so. If not, you can make an appointment with an attorney to have your own paperwork done and let your dad know you are doing this. He maybe will then decide to join you and get his taken care of. Let him know that "something" can happen to anyone and we all need our legal work taken care of. I'd leave his dementia out of the conversation.
Sometimes the best way for this, as well as his driving, is to get a third party - not a family member - to talk with him. Elders often don't like having their kids tell them what to do. That's so hard on the ego. But they sometimes listen to a trusted friends. At your dad's age, most of his good friends are likely deceased, which makes it tough. But maybe he has a "young" friend of the family he trusts, say around 70, who can tell him that it's time to let someone else handle his finances. It looks like you have your hands full. Please check in and let us know how it's going.
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Hi Carol,
Fortunately I do have POA and Healthcare Surrogate. Sadly Dad moved to Florida from Ohio about a year after his 3rd wife died. Even though it seemed he had friends there apparently not and he did not feel at home there anymore. He is very active and participates in many activities but does not engage with other people so he has no friends here. He doesn't like "old" people so it will be hard for him to even find a 'younger' friend. He has "fired" both his doctors and wouldn't believe them. I will try at the church he is attending and see if anyone there is close to him. He doesn't tell me much. Thanks for the advice. It was wonderful to find this site!!
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