mdetri Asked January 2012

How specific can I get with CNAs in mom's nursing home about her needs?

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Mom's condition has changed drastically, although somewhat progressively, over the last few months. Is it obnoxious to leave a list of what I consider "little things" taped on the wall in her room for the CNAs to read? For example, the TV is left on so loud, they put those non-skid booties on her which she hates and by the way she is not even walking or putting her feet on the ground, and I want to ask them to just put her own socks on. Another thing is that they never pull the curtain back (surrounding her bed) so that she can see the pictures that I tape on the wall when she's lying in bed. She is pretty immobile now, not eating and with a feeding tube and her speech is somewhat impaired, but I think that even if she could speak, she is so tired of it all (Neurologists think she as PSP). And knowing her little preferences, I want to ask them to change those few things. It's hard for me to catch her regular CNAs and talk wtih them because I tend to go off hours and on the weekend. Will they see this as totally obnoxious? Not sure why, but I worry about that! Oh and sometimes I go and find snack wrappers in mom's garbage can. I would hope that they have better sense than to eat in front of her, but I don't know if these wrappers belong to the CNAs or to mom's roommate (in which case, I can't and wouldn't complain) but feel like I have to say something.

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NancyH Jan 2012
Does she share the TV with her roommate or does she have her own? When my mother-in-law was in the nursing home for rehab when she broke her hip, she had her own TV that sat on her dresser. We got her a pair of headphones for it, so that she didn't have to listen to her roommate's TV. Is that on option for your mom? If it is, make sure you paint them pink or do something to them that's distinctive! Believe me, they'll get 'lost' if you don't. If you can't stay with your mom for a longer period of time, then can someone from the family stay longer? I'm thinking that if someone was there longer, then they'd be able to catch whoever is the main caretaker for mom, and mention the things you're concerned about. Once that your requests are actually heard and understood, then I would think that would resolve that. I used to stop at the store every Friday and bring the staff that was 'hands on' for my mother-in-law, a plate of cookies. They got to know who I was, and were much more willing to help me out as a result.
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