Is it wrong to want a small compensation for being the sole person responsible for my dad's well being?

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the total cleaning out of his house he will never return to, and now that I decided to rent it to help with some funds for his monthly nursing home expense, the "landlord" of his house. I must go to the pharmacy to pickup his refill meds then take them to the nursing home, as his HMO wont mail them to the home. I travel 21 miles one way twice a month to do this chore. Now I'm not bitter about this, but between taking care of his house, and running errands for meds, I think I should at least get gas money from his pocket vs mine. I'm not greedy. I am executor to his estate, and worry about what is proper and what isn't.

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My mother-in-law ALWAYS insists on paying for my gas every time she and I are together. I used to say 'no' but she has the money and wants to, so I just say 'thank you' and all is good. I know, that she knows, that without ME taking her places and getting her out of her asst living place, she would RARELY get out at all. So it's a win win for everyone.
Caring for a parent is costly. It is NOT wrong to require compensation. Each caregiver has different financial needs. Prior to my father moving into our home, we drove 100 miles round trip 2-3 times a week, which cost us $300 a month. We are on a pension, so this was a great hardship. I did ask my father just for gas $$, but his reply was don't come see me. When he moved in with us, I requested & am receiving a stipend. He's now moving to assisted living & I will be cleaning & clearing out his home, selling off his 20 cars & trucks which is still a 100 mile round trip. I have POA & I will be reimbursing myself not for my time, but for gas. Good luck!
No, it is certainly not wrong. It is sensible in my book. There are those (and you may hear from them here) who insist that you should be doing this out of love. Well, getting some compensation in no way diminishes the love you put into it.

To keep it "proper", especially if there are other relatives who might raise questions laters, have a Care Agreement drawn up that spells out the details of what you are recieiving and what you are doing. Again, this is just a sensible practical step. It in no way diminishes the fact that you are acting in love and compassion.

I don't know what other documents you have in place -- POA, etc, -- but seeing a lawyer who specializes in Elder Law might be a good investment at this point.

Good luck to you and to your father!

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