sickandscared Asked September 2012

How to resign from conservator and guardian?

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I am in process of being my grandmother's conservator and guardian. This has been going on for 4 months now. My grandmother is refusing medical treatment. Before I started this I was a diabetic. Since all of this my health has worsened. I am on insulin now and high blood pressure medicine. I have passed out a few times due to diabetes.
I am afraid at this point that me worrying about my grandmother is making my health terrible and worry that soon I will be in hospital and not care for my grandmother.
My grandmother refuses all treatment and just wants to die! This is why I wanted to be guardian in first place. My lawyer at time knew how bad situation was and that she needed emergency guardian and still it has been 4 months now. Her health is worse and now mine is! I do not know what is taking so long... I am afraid much longer we both will be in bad shape therefore I want to resign and save myself before something bad happens to me. How can I resign when it has not been approved yet?

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PCVS Sep 2012
Talk to someone from hospice. If she is at an end of life point they will know and can advise. If she is not then you definitely need to find another guardian and others have given you good advice here.
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ImaReformer Sep 2012
File a motion to withdraw petition based on your own health problems.
If there is money in the estate, the court will appoint a stranger as guardian and he/she may suck up all the assets by overbilling, leaving mother on Medicaid.
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I know exactly what you are talking about. I am a brittle insulin dependent diabetic. I have been in and out of hospitals more times than I can count due to low blood sugars. I live alone. I am disabled with RA and heart problems, too. I am caring for my Mom as my sister works full time. It is hard, and I once came home from a day with her and my daughter and sister found me passed out. My blood sugar was down to 14. The situation you are in is not only difficult, but life threatening. I agree-call elder services in your area. You have a choice. The courthouse/clerk can't provide you with legal advice. I have called before to ask questions and been told just that. My Dad had diabetes and lived to be 78. Your grandmother would not want you to sacrifice your life and future to save hers. It's not unusual for an elderly person to say, "Enough". Quality of life is often more important than quantity. She may be looking forward to being reuniting with her loved ones who have already passed. I know my Dad was. He saw his Mom and sister just prior to passing away. It is not life for her, it is now just existence. Sometimes the kindest, most loving thing you can do is let them go.
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naturpartnr Sep 2012
If request to authorize authority is still in process, call whomever is handling it
informing that the situation has changed and you are no longer able to commit
to the responsibility. You can't save people from themselves. Be glad you
caught it in time to stop it..I also have diabetes, and it IS true that your head
and your body are connected. Diabetes will shorten your life, and treatment is
often trial and error. And don't let them set you up as an alternate or co-guardian.
We try so hard to make their life as it was, often by giving them ours...My mom
one day refused her medication, it went on for two weeks, doctor said if she has her mind she has a right not to be imprisoned here..and we should meet as a
family and decide what we would support. WRONG !! Six kids, three to let her
decide, three to give it in her arm or IV..then she stopped eating, and the reason
she gave was it was poison and we were trying to kill her. OMG.. took her to
the emergency room, was dehydrated, etc. They admitted her, medicated her
(she ate well for them by the way). Doc said paranoia is common among the elderly and really cannot be cured without sedating them. The woman who
criticized our makeup and clothes and hair and kids and husbands and all
other things all our life, has become a Diva.and we are expected to serve
her and respond to her daily, groom her, entertain her, pet her, because she
thinks we work for her, and doesn't know who we are. So disappointed and
embarrassed and helpless. Will this NEVER be over ?
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marymar Sep 2012
Whatever you do, please don't feel guilty.
And I can tell you from personal experience with my dad who passed away at 95 eight years after a stroke and with at least 3 years of being "kept alive" by a paid companion who was thinking about her income from him more than she was about his comfort and well-being, there are worse things than being allowed to die if that is what an elderly, sick person wants.
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Call your local Council on Aging of Department of Social Services - Elderly Services and explain and ask for help.
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ange02 Sep 2012
If you cannot afford an attorney , call your assigned court ( that is in charge of your district ) & speak to the court clerk.
They should be able to listen & direct you as to how to proceed with your concern.
Hope this helps.
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