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My husband and I have been given POA (full and immediate) for my MIL, forms are signed, witnessed and notarized. We now need to pay bills from her account for her personal items, while she may not drive again we want to keep her auto insurance current just in case as well as cell phone bill, etc. We can't find a check book so I will need to go to bank and take POA I am guessing. If she gives me her PIN to her debit, am I allowed to remove the cash, get a money order and pay that way? I am a very cautious person, I have seen my brother and sister in law for years step back in a crisis, then come at the person that steps in to help when crisis is over so my husband and I always, always have documentation, permission, etc for everything we do for his parents. Until now, we just paid everything out of our money when needed, but my health care costs and loss of my job prevent that this time.
Please offer us advise on best way to deal with the horrible money/family issue, and if we have the same right as the account holder or if we need to do things differently.
Thanks to all of you for any help you offer, MOSTLY thanks for loving and caring for others.
Angel

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Hi Angel,
Your are wise to document everything you do, especially with the family history. However, as to how to use the POA, simply take a copy to the bank. They will keep that on file. They may have other instructions for you depending on their procedure.
You'll need copies for may other transactions, as well. You may have to send a copy to her insurance company, etc. depending on how you pay for the services. I used to keep a copy in the glove compartment of my vehicle so I'd have it just in case. You'll do a good job with this. Just keep good records. That may mean not using the ATM more than necessary because it's easier to prove how money was used if you use checks or a charge account. Keep receipts, as well.
Best,
Carol
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Thank you Carol. I was raised in a quiet, loving home and by parents who taught us that when you help someone you do it purely from compassion, and to never expect anything from it except the good feeling you'll get in your heart. My husband's family (him excluded) holds every act over someone. My FIL wants Tim's brother to compensate him for the braces they put on his teeth when he was in middle school! The fact that my anxiety is warranted still feels weird to have to worry about such things. I would never think my brothers or their wives would take a penny from my family so I don't grasp Tim's parents and siblings being the opposite. I just need to keep coming to this site for support and advise, talking openly with my husband, staying focused on loving and caring for my in-laws and remember we are not all raised with happiness, compassion and fairness. I feel sad that Tim's siblings are so suspicious because it shows me that they were raised with doubt and accusations. Thanks again and keep sharing thoughts everyone!
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