What do I do when my 83 year-old mother with dementia needs help, but doesn't want my help?
My mother has lots of health problems and her dementia is getting worse and that makes everything else worse. She is so rude and irritable to me that I just can hardly stand it anymore. She has very bad eyesight due to 55 year of diabetes, she has seizures about every two weeks (fainting type), bad balance which she using a lot a w alker, falls more often now, always dizzy and feels bad, bad back, etc.
She constantly complains about her health, but she complains all the time about how dark it is. We burn all the lights with 100 wt. bulbs.
So, she makes all these comments about it is so dark in my room I can't see to get my clothes on. I offer to get her clothes out and she always says no she'll do it. I'll offer 2-3 times in different ways and she gets rude and then, I just leave and go on. I'll check back with her in a few minutes to see if she needs me to help her and more times than not, I have to help her do something.
But, what makes it so bad and makes me just leave her room is her attitude toward me. Just down right rude to me about it. I get tired of being treated so awful when I'm trying to be helpful.
So, what do I do when I'm trying to be helpful and she is rude about not wanting my help? She needs help, but won't admit it. I feel bad leaving her, but what else do I do...stand there and let her continue to be rude to me?
I need help!! LOL (but it isn't really funny!!) Thank you for your help.