Should I let my mother see her house one last time before I sell it?

Follow
Share
This question has been closed for answers. Ask a New Question.
6

Answers

Show:
We are in the last two weeks of cleaning out the condo for Mom. She is living in assisted living and has been since October. So far she has only been in her home twice since her strokes and both times were ok. Because everyone expects her to be strong, she is when she is home, however, the next few meals that she eats will not stay down. We have been dealing with that for over a year. I have decided that her help in the cleaning process will only be to look over things that I am unsure as to how important they are to her and that this will take place in her new surroundings. My emotions are all over the place and at times I should not be near her. Thanks for the previous messages.
Helpful Answer (0)
Report

I had an emotional time when I sold the house so I decided it would be too much for mother. She would occasionally ask how it was but that has all stopped. I think it is a decision you have to make knowing the condition of their emotional capacities
Helpful Answer (0)
Report

This is the one thing I would let the person decide what they want. It is a little like going to a funeral versus just going to the memorial service. Some people find the last visit so important - the formal saying goodbye - others find it too hard emotionally and are just going to be better off keeping their memories. After I had the estate sale and sold my Mom's house I slept in it the one last time, with it all empty, just needing to do that for the reality to register itself with me. Mom did not want to visit home at all, ever, in the two and half years she was away. She would ask if everything was OK and if it needed dusted...she looked at some pictures of the yard after I got the yard work done to reassure her that was being taken care of. I sitll have dreams of the house with mom and dad in it and at least some of their stuff still there. If you decide not to do the last visit, keep a few favorite items and take a bunch of pictures in case that will be helpful to you or to them later on!!
Helpful Answer (2)
Report

i took my dad to his trailer and let him sit on his porch for one last time . my brother said i wouldnt do that if i were you , u may not be able to get him back in the car . but i did with no pblm . he knew it was my house or back innursing home and he knew he wasnt able to live alone .
he will mention it once a while that he s home sick .
i often reminded him that my home is his too and u are at home .
now i dont think he remeberes his trailer very much .
Helpful Answer (1)
Report

Nanstill, that is good advice. Go as a group and let her know this is indeed thee one last time. I would also suggest, taking a camera and taking pictures, then putting them into an album for her.
Helpful Answer (2)
Report

I am in the same situation. My experiences with taking Mom to her house since moving her to an AFL 3 months ago have not been good. She asks to go everytime I see her - 2 or 3 times a week - so I have given in a couple of times.

My brother and his family took her last time and it went better because she does not "act up" when with him. She even told my daughter she had no problem leaving the house. THEN...this past weekend she became angry and hostile at me about selling the house.

Our family has decided that we might tell mother we are taking her one last time before it is actually sold and go as a group - that way she will not verbally (and sometimes physically) attack one of us. It it is a touchy issue, don't go with her alone. I'm learning as I go here.

Good luck, I'll watch for post to see how it goes.
Helpful Answer (1)
Report

This question has been closed for answers. Ask a New Question.
Related
Questions