I thought about 4 yrs. ago that my mom was having memory problems b/c she was sending cards to the wrong address and calling her own phone, She has had 2 falls in 2 years. After the last one, which I heard about 3 weeks later, I decided i needed to check out the situation even though my sister said nothing was wrong. Now my mom is with me and getting medical care and attending an Elder Care facility for dementia patients during the day. I gave up returning to school and a chance at a job to do this and I know it is right. I am just tired of sibling-in-denial who riles up Mom on phone calls and won't even talk to me now. Now Mom wants to return to sister and live in the dark (she says...) and sister would probably just do the same thing to her 87-yr.-old mother. I want to be able to tell Mom that she is healthier and safer with me. I can tough it out but the undermining is the stressful killer. Spouse agrees with me. Since I can't work and care for my mom, he is the breadwinner for her and our college son who doesn't have a job. I had to spend money because Mom came here with 2 pairs of old pants and some ancient shirts and little else. I have finally gotten her to let me give her a bath and I dress her appropriately. I feed her well and she looks so much better. I keep her hydrated. I still feel sad when she asks when is she going home and asks me to take her to the bus. I know she has enjoyed it here with us and she likes the daycare but will not admit that she can't be alone. Any suggestions? Once, when I took Mom out and my sister could not reach us, my sister left angry, snarky voicemails. I could use some support.