Mom wants copies of all of her legal documents in her nursing home room, "just in case" the staff needs them. How can I get her to see it's not safe?
First let me be clear; I don't want this business of POA but I am "it" Saying yes I'll do it is one thing and being responsible to carry it out is another, especially with the Mother that I have.
Mom first made my sis and I POA, then (rightly so) felt my sis wasn't responsible and took her off, leaving me to carry the responsibilities out ( now I wish she had left me off too!). Mom is a control freak! She lives in N.H. care and now wants copies of all the important documents, S.S.#, State I.D. etc "in case" they are requested of her which I have exhausted myself with explaining that the N.H. has everything they need even in case they can't contact me. SHe's seen proof of it when they had to rush her to the E.R., she needed not one piece of paper because it was all taken care of.
I am ready and happily willing to relinquish my POA, but of her own admission, who could she trust? And of my own words, apparently no one, not even yourself because you admit...you are un-able to handle business matters anymore so WHAT DO YOU WANT????
I thought of making a faux "important document folder" with phone numbers of the family members, Ins. Company, but then where does it end, she'll want the bank's phone # which will lead to having the bank account floating around because she will not leave anything in one place, she moves everything from place to place then forgets where it is and then blames any and everyone else for taking it. Can you see where I 'm going???? Now we worry about I.D. theft.
There's just not much to review but once a month I take the bank statement to her to review ( she can't see it, she's looking at it upside down!) i read the activity off to her, give her balance and take the statement home.
She wants Co-control and I don't operate that way, either I return control her 100% or she allows me to manage their affairs 100%, reason being if she looses, mis-places, signs up, agree to something I cannot, will not be responsible for the out comes.
Just before she entered the N.H. with my Dad, she was giving out information over the phone to solicitors then panicking and wanting me to "fix" it. 96 yr old don't care what happens but trust that all is well...as it is!
I just want peace of mind. My mom means well, but she's a worrier and that's just what she doing, laying up there worrying about what to worry about next.
Any suggestions any one???? I could scream,