PAT SUE were either of your parents in the military? Try "Aid and Attendance" or Widows assistance with the VA. The military won't offer or tell you about these programs but there are programs out there for our vets and their spouse's, we just have to find them.
paying for medicare! I hate it! I have been paying all my working years into medicare then when my income has decreased and can't work at I once did. They give me another bill, and I have to pay monthly for medicare! I HAVE LESS COMING IN NOW! but they take what they want from it anyway! So if children want paid for caring for their parents where does the money come from? Medicare, how will the Gov. make that money up? Raise our monthly premiums from people who can't work like they use too.
The person is in their own homes/ or in homes of their children/ being taking care of by their children! Their children!! , Why should tax payers have to pay their own children to take care of mom and dad? Any how the democrats will never allow the American public that money, they have to give it to the illegals coming across the boarder.
You are not going to get paid a lot of money. You are lucky you get $10.00 an hour. That is not enough to take care of someone 24 hours 7 days a week. I have a mom that I want to bring home from the nursing home and the state does not have anyone reliable to come in every day to do this. Most of them don’t speak English. How do they get hired if they are unreliable and can’t speak english. My mom has trouble understanding anyone with an accent. My mom has been in the nursing home since February and I want her home. I never wanted her in a nursing home. I hate them. I cannot get paid enough from the state to stay home and take care of her. It also takes a long time to get this. Our Government needs to help the elderly. We all need to start a campaign to help all elderly people. Family taking care of family is cheaper then a nursing home. You also need medical insurance and you have to pay for that too. $10-$15 an hour is not going to cut it. I am a single person and my mom is the only family I have left. I am so tired of Social workers and state workers. They do nothing for you. They defend the nursing homes in my opinion.
I am a certified peer specialist with the GBHD. I dont work currently. I saved up to finish school and then my mom got hospitalized again and my stress was over whelming. I have Bipolar and panic disorder, I care for all her matters financial and legal and also gave up a lot of income my career to some degree I am going for social work my son has GAD and my husband has to work 12 hrs 6 days a week. My mom has dementia and a lot of other issues. My aunt psychically and mentally neglects my mom and prevents her from using the phone and fights me each time i visit. Making it very clear that I am not welcome nor is she. However, I don't have the space or time to take care of her. Unless i got compensated and would be happy to do so as long as i could. i already do everything except receive bill money from her and she doesnt sleep hear. However i file all her papers take her to every appointment and purchase 98% of her meds toiletries and supplies. My aunt had her on the floor on a kids mattress with nothing in her room. If I had a larger space and more time I would take her in. i live in GA and am willing to continue training. It is getting to the point i have to report my aunt for financial and emotional neglect, threats and gas lighting. My mom would have to go into a home. Can I get income to provide the resources to stay home and provide for my self kids and mom and my husband wont overwork himself to death.
The government doesn't pay for anything, taxpayers do. Every government program costs more and delivers less than promised. All the welfare states are going broke because the populations are aging and not enough children being born. In socialist systems, eventually the well runs dry.
get your mom on state health care program. then you' ll be eligible for another state program called adult foster care. who pays tax free every month., plus can visit adult day care free programs as well. some even provide transportation
You should. People don't realize how hard it is to go to the grocery store or remember to pay bills. I know because without my son I don't know what i would do. I keep a roof over our heads but, he needs something for his personal needs.
I agree with all the above, there needs to be change in this country to care for the caregiver's that save the state a great deal of money from having to pay for nursing home care. Here is a website that tells you what states have what benefits: payingforseniorcare/medicaid-waivers/assisted-living.html. I'm in New York and they offer what is called Community Medicaid. When accepted Medicaid pays for the aides for in home care. Medicaid pays for nursing home care. In some areas, maybe not all, but they do in New York, they pay family members as well. They just don't pay the spouse. I am in the process of working thru this program for my mom. By the way my mom lives with me, is 81 and in the later stages of dementia. Hire a good care manager to manage the paperwork and processing, this person could make all the difference in the world for you and the one you are caring for. I hesitated going this route because I hate the red tape of government programs, but it was necessary due to lack of funds for home care which is so expensive. Again I am in New York and the care manager I am using is: hurley care solutions. If you check out her site it will give you an idea of what a care manager does. Good luck. I'm available if I can be of any further help to anyone. Like I say, I just got thru the application process, mom has been accepted, and they approved 24/7 care right from the start. So now I am working with an agency that will pay the caregivers and help me find the appropriate people to fill all the time slots. It's not an easy process, but mom's care is the most important thing and keeping her home is the primary goal. This will allow me to do both of those things and not drag me down financially at the same time. This journey is not over, I expect there will be hiccups along the way, but I have to try everything I can to make this work for my mom. Take care of yourself.
I take 24 hr. care of my husband because of a mistake in his surgery , He is 85 and I will be 80 in /Feb. Looks like no help here. He is also a Vet. So much for our country taking care of their own.
Mayl51, there isn't anything you need to do for becoming your Mom's caregiver, you just do it. You need to ask yourself if you are ready for this, because if Mom has beginning dementia that could be a10 year journey.
Here are some things to think about if one is trying to decide whether to quit work to care for an aging parent.... on average if a working person quits work he/she will lose over the years between $285,000 and $325,000 which includes not only loss of salary over those years... it also includes the net worth loss of the health insurance coverage.... loss of money being put into Social Security/Medicare..... loss of other benefits such as matching 401(k).... profit sharing.... workman's comp insurance.... company sponsored life insurance.... vacation pay, sick pay.... tuition assistance, etc. [source: in part Reuters 5/30/12]
Mayl51, if you want to be paid, you need to ask your Mother to pay you. If she says yes, have an employment agreement drawn up where you list your duties, the number of hours each week, the hourly rate, what days you will have off [if any], who will fill in for you in case you can't work for a a day or more, and who will pay the payroll taxes. I know, this can become complex.
Another option if you feel that Mom will keep continuing with these health issues is to sell her house and have her move into Assisted Living. There are a lot of really nice places, some set up like a hotel. Mom would be around people of her own age, and there is usually Staff and a nurse on duty 24 hours a day.
Or Mom could hire paid professional caregivers to come into her home from an Agency that is licensed, insured, bonded and has workman's comp. That would help you keep your job so you can add into your own retirement fund.
Hope a decision is made that works out best for everyone.
Mother coming home from rehab, has heart problems, diabetics, and beginning dementia problems and insists on living in her house. We live in Texas and I would like to quit my job to care for her, what do I need to do?
This is the most commonly asked question on this site. There are many articles and threads that discuss this. Here is a good place to start. Quick answer is that your parent would need to pay you, or be qualified for Medicaid or Veterans Assistance to get money to pay you. https://www.agingcare.com/articles/how-to-get-paid-for-being-a-caregiver-135476.htm
My dad lives with me after my mother passed away he has just broke his hip and taking therapy in the hospital i have been taking fmla at work is there any programs where i can get money to pay my bills when he comes home so i can stay home for a few months with him and not have to worry about paying my bills?
So my sister has volunteered to stay with my mom, who can no longer stay home alone. She will need some compensation and we siblings think we can scrap together some cash to help BUT we don't know how we could afford to buy her health insurance nor could any of us pay for the penalty of not having health insurance. What rules would protect the family from trying to help each other out here.
Majority of grown children do not get paid for caring for their parent, unless the parent can pay from their own retirement fund.
Now if the parent can pay you, the parent might as well hire a caregiver, thus giving you the opportunity to get back into the workforce.... otherwise you will be losing hundreds of thousands of dollars in salary over the years plus net worth of your health insurance, lost of funds placed into Medicare and into Social Security... loss of 401(k) contributions, profit sharing, vacation pay, sick day pay, tuition reimbursement [it all depends on where you work], etc.
Otherwise check with your State Medicaid office to see if your parent can qualify. Some States will pay you minimum wage but only for a couple of hours each day.
Wow, after reading some of these letters, I can see some of you are in the same boat as I am. My father is seventy six years old with multiple health problems. He is also a recent amputee and now must use a wheel chair to get around. Problem is , our house is older and a regular wheelchair will not fit through the doorways. We must use a transfer chair to move him around the house. My mother, who is seventy four also has health problems and is not always able to help my dad when he needs it, or drive him to his many doctors appointments. As of April 1,I no longer have a job, as the company I worked for closed. The ideal thing would be for me to be there caregiver, taking care of both of them. I have been doing it for the past 10 yrs. I do not understand how our government could turn down a family member taking care of family, verses a nursing home, or a home nurse. We have had home health care recently and it was a joke. I did more for them when I got home for work than they ever did. We can pay for people to have multiple children, sit around the house and do nothing etc. and yet we can not save money by doing what we are suppose to do by taking care of our parents. This country has a serious problem. I would not expect to be paid thousands a week. Base it on the salary I was making, just like unemployment. Look at the money that could be saved. If anyone knows who in the government we could talk to, I woild love too.
For those of you trying to care for your parents, I urge caution before giving up your own job. You also have to figure out how to care for you, too. And if you didn't earn enough for social security benefits then even that sum won't be there for you.
Some helpful ideas: if you can prove you are supporting your parent at least 50% of costs, then you can claim them on taxes, and may be able to file as head of household and may get earned income credits.
If your parent is living with you and is over 67, and you have earned social security benefits, then the parent may be able to get social security off of your benefits. But this needs to be filed before May 1 2016. The laws are changing then.
For those of you wondering if there is money for you to take care of your parents, the answer is no, unless your parent has those funds. This is not judgment, just fact.
If you have been using your parents funds, you need to keep all receipts, and if possible, get caregiver contracts between you and them. Again, this isn't judgment, just discussing from my personal experiences. One sibling can and will turn on another, and the law will be on the seniors side without proof of what you used the funds for.
The fact is, there is some money available if the parent served in the military in a war. See your local veterans affairs office or their website. That money can be used for a deceased veterans spouse if the marriage did not end in divorce.
There is also some Medicaid for those who qualify, and social security for those who qualify. But there isn't a government fund to pay for elderly infirmed. This is a relatively new problem. In the past, whole families took care of this. Now we have so many nuclear families, and people living much longer in poor health than before.
first of all to the people that don't think people should get paid to care for the parents are ignorant. try being single and having to work two jobs, but your parent can.t be alone most of the time because she falls and thats only part of the problem, she has two bad knees and a bad rotary cup, but at 80 surgery is a risk. how do I care for her if I have to work two jobs just so I can have a car and a home of my own? If there was some sort of income for this situation, I could at least drop my part time job and be with her more. I spend a lot of time with her when I can but I worry about her falling and laying on the floor for 6 hours like the last time she fell because she didnt want to bother me at work! I need some sort of resource for what it is I can do in order to take proper care of my mother, I feel guilty because I am a caregiver at my job and here I am taking care of others more than I am for my own mother! any ideas?
My name has been on my mothers account for 20+ years and I have taken care of her part time for 6 1/2 years and then she moved in with us for almost 2 years now and we charge her accordingly as she was paying in an Independent Apartment complex. Since I have been on the account longer than 5 years, will I have go give money back that I have used to cover our expenses in caring for her? (Mortgage, insurance, food, utilities, gas, etc...) We used our own money to assist her at times and do not keep track of it. It should be done for "LOVE", but no amount of money can cover the loss of privacy. How is it ok to pay for her to be in an Independent Living to the amount of $1500.00 a month, but not be able to have her pay for her to live in our home and cause our expenses to double in some case? The grocery bill has more than doubled because of all her "special need items".
Here is one thing to think about if one is trying to decide whether to quit work to care for an aging parent.... on average if a working woman quits work she will lose $325,000 [salary, health insurance, pension, other benefits], and a working man quits work he will lose $285,000.
Would any of us write our parent a check for $325,000 or $285,000 so that parent can remain in their own home? That gives all of us a lot of food for thought, doesn't it.
If any of us stop by a Caregiver's Agency, how many of us would be hired? I remember telling my parents if an Agency sent out a person who couldn't lift you if you fell... couldn't take your blood pressure... doesn't know CPR... doesn't know how to listen to your heart for irregular beats, etc... doesn't like household chores, especially cooking.... gets panicky when driving... and is pushing 70 years old, would you accept this person in your home as your Caregiver. My parents said *no*. Well, Mom and Dad, THAT person would be me. That was an eye opening conversation for my parents.
There are a few things that may help....aid and assistance through medicaid will pay a family member or friend designated as a care giver but not a spouse, of course this is based off the patients income/SSI etc.... Check for any benefits available for your loved one from the VA or VA spouse is avail to anyone who was in the active military and costs are more than their income aid and assistance or housebound are 2 programs.I agree with "give a hug", people who have never done this don't understand it or they have so much money they have no need to work. I gave up a fantastic job to care for mom when dad died. She could not live alone. She finally got so bad I could not do it alone anymore and I also have a chronic illness.I have no family, siblings or children to help. My savings in completely gone...goes fast at $6,000 a month for care over several years!People PLEASE get long term care insurance for your parents and as young as possible while you can still get the policy, it is only going to get worse as all us baby boomers hit the system. Forget about life insurance or get a LTC policy that will convert if you don't use it. I wish I had known about it years ago though my parents would not have paid for it I would have.Mom's first stroke was 20 years ago so you can imagine the astronomical costs for caring for someone that long. I agree our goverment should help defray these costs. You're ok if you are poverty level or extremely wealthy but if you are middle class forget it!Hope one of these programs will work for you!
I think it varies from state to state. I researched it for my grandmother and the process was murky to say the least. I was told by a couple of nurses and social workers that i could get paid 15 bucks a day here in South Carolina. Here you have to go through signing them up for medicaid. They said that you usually have to wait a year after applying though to get it started. My grandmother was on hospice at the time and they said she could not be on hospice while I was getting paid. My grandma is 100 so I said to h*ll with it and figured she would be gone by the time I figured out how to get the money or had to place her in a home. Search for "Cash and Counseling programs" i think it is called different things in different states.
What is ironic is that various govt programs do pay for NH care, which is certainly more than assisting a family to keep their loved ones at home would be. Here in California, there is assistance--SSI (I think it was) paid for a day worker for my MIL, which made it possible for my husband and I to continue operating our business, and I have a friend who was getting assistance for the care of an in-law in poor health. (The widowed sister-in-law had no place to go after her husband passed away and was almost bedridden herself with a variety of disabling things; my friend took her to doctors as needed and encouraged her to be active and eat properly, and she is now doing much better, even though she still has a lot of pain and other issues.) This assistance was a program of the local Dept of Aging, and was being reorganized recently so I don't know the current status.
One question, where will all this money come from to pay for everyone to take care of their parent(s)?
We need to stop and think the money is taken from our taxes. To fund every single household where there is an elder would cost trillions of dollars... that would mean our payroll taxes, income taxes, sales taxes, property taxes, etc. would go sky high. I couldn't imagine half of one's salary for those who are employed outside of the home going back to the government in the form of taxes.
https://www.agingcare.com/questions/My-mom-cant-afford-to-pay-for-someone-to-come-in-and-she-doesnt-have-enough-to-pay-me-to-stay-home-S-439781.htm
ll be eligible for another state program called adult foster care. who pays tax free every month., plus can visit adult day care free programs as well. some even provide transportation
Here is a website that tells you what states have what benefits: payingforseniorcare/medicaid-waivers/assisted-living.html.
I'm in New York and they offer what is called Community Medicaid. When accepted Medicaid pays for the aides for in home care. Medicaid pays for nursing home care. In some areas, maybe not all, but they do in New York, they pay family members as well. They just don't pay the spouse. I am in the process of working thru this program for my mom. By the way my mom lives with me, is 81 and in the later stages of dementia.
Hire a good care manager to manage the paperwork and processing, this person could make all the difference in the world for you and the one you are caring for. I hesitated going this route because I hate the red tape of government programs, but it was necessary due to lack of funds for home care which is so expensive.
Again I am in New York and the care manager I am using is: hurley care solutions. If you check out her site it will give you an idea of what a care manager does. Good luck.
I'm available if I can be of any further help to anyone. Like I say, I just got thru the application process, mom has been accepted, and they approved 24/7 care right from the start. So now I am working with an agency that will pay the caregivers and help me find the appropriate people to fill all the time slots. It's not an easy process, but mom's care is the most important thing and keeping her home is the primary goal. This will allow me to do both of those things and not drag me down financially at the same time. This journey is not over, I expect there will be hiccups along the way, but I have to try everything I can to make this work for my mom. Take care of yourself.
Here are some things to think about if one is trying to decide whether to quit work to care for an aging parent.... on average if a working person quits work he/she will lose over the years between $285,000 and $325,000 which includes not only loss of salary over those years... it also includes the net worth loss of the health insurance coverage.... loss of money being put into Social Security/Medicare..... loss of other benefits such as matching 401(k).... profit sharing.... workman's comp insurance.... company sponsored life insurance.... vacation pay, sick pay.... tuition assistance, etc. [source: in part Reuters 5/30/12]
Mayl51, if you want to be paid, you need to ask your Mother to pay you. If she says yes, have an employment agreement drawn up where you list your duties, the number of hours each week, the hourly rate, what days you will have off [if any], who will fill in for you in case you can't work for a a day or more, and who will pay the payroll taxes. I know, this can become complex.
Another option if you feel that Mom will keep continuing with these health issues is to sell her house and have her move into Assisted Living. There are a lot of really nice places, some set up like a hotel. Mom would be around people of her own age, and there is usually Staff and a nurse on duty 24 hours a day.
Or Mom could hire paid professional caregivers to come into her home from an Agency that is licensed, insured, bonded and has workman's comp. That would help you keep your job so you can add into your own retirement fund.
Hope a decision is made that works out best for everyone.
https://www.agingcare.com/articles/how-to-get-paid-for-being-a-caregiver-135476.htm
Now if the parent can pay you, the parent might as well hire a caregiver, thus giving you the opportunity to get back into the workforce.... otherwise you will be losing hundreds of thousands of dollars in salary over the years plus net worth of your health insurance, lost of funds placed into Medicare and into Social Security... loss of 401(k) contributions, profit sharing, vacation pay, sick day pay, tuition reimbursement [it all depends on where you work], etc.
Otherwise check with your State Medicaid office to see if your parent can qualify. Some States will pay you minimum wage but only for a couple of hours each day.
Some helpful ideas: if you can prove you are supporting your parent at least 50% of costs, then you can claim them on taxes, and may be able to file as head of household and may get earned income credits.
If your parent is living with you and is over 67, and you have earned social security benefits, then the parent may be able to get social security off of your benefits. But this needs to be filed before May 1 2016. The laws are changing then.
If you have been using your parents funds, you need to keep all receipts, and if possible, get caregiver contracts between you and them. Again, this isn't judgment, just discussing from my personal experiences. One sibling can and will turn on another, and the law will be on the seniors side without proof of what you used the funds for.
The fact is, there is some money available if the parent served in the military in a war. See your local veterans affairs office or their website. That money can be used for a deceased veterans spouse if the marriage did not end in divorce.
There is also some Medicaid for those who qualify, and social security for those who qualify. But there isn't a government fund to pay for elderly infirmed. This is a relatively new problem. In the past, whole families took care of this. Now we have so many nuclear families, and people living much longer in poor health than before.
Would any of us write our parent a check for $325,000 or $285,000 so that parent can remain in their own home? That gives all of us a lot of food for thought, doesn't it.
If any of us stop by a Caregiver's Agency, how many of us would be hired? I remember telling my parents if an Agency sent out a person who couldn't lift you if you fell... couldn't take your blood pressure... doesn't know CPR... doesn't know how to listen to your heart for irregular beats, etc... doesn't like household chores, especially cooking.... gets panicky when driving... and is pushing 70 years old, would you accept this person in your home as your Caregiver. My parents said *no*. Well, Mom and Dad, THAT person would be me. That was an eye opening conversation for my parents.
We need to stop and think the money is taken from our taxes. To fund every single household where there is an elder would cost trillions of dollars... that would mean our payroll taxes, income taxes, sales taxes, property taxes, etc. would go sky high. I couldn't imagine half of one's salary for those who are employed outside of the home going back to the government in the form of taxes.