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My grandmother has dementia. My sister and myself are the caregivers. We find her looking to us to answer and make every little decision for her when we are around (is it time to get up, can I eat now, what should I do, ect). Yet in the company of others or on her own she makes these "everyday" living decision just fine. I try to reinforce that she is able to do these things on her own and she does not need to ask. It's not working.

Is this a normal pattern for those suffering from dementia? A\
Any suggestions on how to deal with it and get her try and to these things she is capable of doing on her ow?

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Perhaps she takes comfort from having someone to rely on and take care of her. Decision making is often difficult for persons with dementia. Sometimes they are very impulsive and do the first thing that pops into their head. Sometimes they can't seem to do anything because all the choices are overwhelming.

Those with dementia often are confused about time. Asking about getting up or eating may reflect this confusion. She truly doesn't know whether she just got into bed or she has slept all night, and whether it is an appropriate time to eat.

Your intentions of trying to help her function independently as long as she can are understandable. But I don't think you can teach her that at this point. As you say, it is not working. You might both feel better if you relax and help her make decisions.
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Typing error. Very frustrated this morning.
"...get her to try and do these things..."
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