How do I deal with a mother who constantly obsesses about constipation?

Follow
Share

My 93 year old mother has been in assisted living for almost a year. She does nothing all day, except complain about being constipated. I have had her to her Dr. several times, and he always checks her out and says that there is no medical problems causing it, she is just very sedentary and needs more fiber. She will not listen to what anyone tells her and gets angry if I won't take her to the Dr./emergency room because she has not had a bowel movement in a couple of days.

How do I deal with this? I find myself hating to call or visit, because I know that all we will talk about is her constipation and that she thinks she will die from it.

This question has been closed for answers. Ask a New Question.
Find Care & Housing
22

Answers

Show:
1 2 3
bless her heart this has obviously become an obsession to her... I would encourage you to get her on a stool softner and also either Miralax or Benefiber daily. Yes she probably needs both of them. Has she had this problem for years? She may feel like this is something she has some control over when she has no control over anything else. She probably does not drink enough liquids or have enough fiber in her diet. There is a juice called Plum Smart that is much more tasty than prune juice you could try some of that too..My Dad had this problem for years, he always talked about the dynomite he took... It was actually dulcolax tablets. hope this helps... take care J
Helpful Answer (0)
Report

I just had another thought! My SIL would give her Fiber One cereal on top of giving her Miralax. After I learned that, I cut the Miralax doseages down to 3/4 x/wk. because it would cause Mt. Vesouvious to erupt. She didn't have that happening to her too much, because she gave it to her hours before she went home.
Helpful Answer (0)
Report

Also, coffee helps my bowels move. Maybe it would help her.
Good luck!
Helpful Answer (0)
Report

Marty,

My MIL is on Miralax (it can be written as an RX by the doctor--she has the generic--polyethelene glycol). All I would do, when she was here before the NH, was mix it in with some water, applesauce (it is sweet tasting, so I got the no sugar added applesauce). She would take it. Within 15 min.-1/2 hr. she would have a BM. We had her on coconut milk (but since that does the same thing as Miralax, she didn't get the Miralax). The coconut milk will cause some weight gain. After a while, we noticed her acting not like herself--aside from the anti-epileptic meds that caused combativeness--but after a while we discontinued the coconut milk due to it interacting with some of the meds she was on at the time. You can get coconut milk in a
'Crisco-like' form at Wal-Mart. You can even cook with it. I would make her grilled cheese sandwiches and wouldn't have to use 'non-cooking spray' with it. Very rarely, would we have to give her MOM (Milk of Magnesia). Yeah, some of her meds did have the side effect of constipation. You have to watch her diet too. She shouldn't have any lite yogurt or diet drinks (not good for people her age). Actually, it's not good for anyone. Anyhow, as I was saying, watch her diet--if someone takes her out, find out what she had for a meal and to drink. Reason being, that can either cause constipation or Mt. Vesouvious.
One night, I served Spaghetti and Meat sauce, she had never pooped outside of the bathroom--my husband left her alone for 10 minutes and when he went back downstairs to see how she was coming along with her meal, he found her rolling a 'meatball' in her hand. You talk about panic-stricken and gross. From then on, someone always ate downstairs with her.
Helpful Answer (0)
Report

Maybe she needs something to relax her so she does not absess over this but if she won't follow the docs instructions she may enjoy haveing a problem that she is able to talk nonstop about, Maybe the only thing you can do is limit your time with her or just say that subject is not to be brought up,
Helpful Answer (0)
Report

My mother and mother-in-law have obsessed with this for years. My mother-in-law took everything/ she could to help but nothing did the trick. My mother on the other hand takes Miralax every morning in her coffee and it works for her. When she was in the hospital, it wasn't available so they tried Milk of Magnesia, drinking hot liquids, prune juice, apple juice etc. until I finally brought my mother's Miralax bottle in from home. My mother added it to her coffee in the morning and within a day or two it started working again.
Helpful Answer (1)
Report

Miralax works well and is over the counter now... It is an osmotic and it helps to move things through... I would try that!!! Oatmeal always works for me or a little applesauce is good too..
Helpful Answer (1)
Report

Hello. My 86 yrs old mother had severe BM problems. Hadn't pooped in days. I've given suppositories, enemas, stool softener, laxative to cure the problem for a couple of days, but back to the same problems days after. Milk of Magnesia didn't work for her. It was a continuous cycle for months.

Her Dr said use fiber, give more water, give more fruits. No good, nothing seems to work. Finally, the doctor said to give her Phillips Caplets Laxatives Dietary Supplement 2x day (500 mg Manesium). I had asked "isn't that too much?" "no", was his replay. Senior's intestine and colin muscles atrophy with age. They can't push the stuff out, no matter how much water they drink or fiber they take. When you use a laxative daily, she shouldn't have constipation problems. It's been a great using the laxative caplets daily-No more poop problem.

My mom began to have anxieties for she was finally becoming having normal BM. "Somethings wrong, I go to the bathroom and have a BM", she would stress. I told her that it's normal to go everyday and don't worry about it. (I've been care giving for almost 4yrs and constantly doing the BM problem.) Now it's no longer an issue.
Good luck to you.
Helpful Answer (0)
Report

It is a relief to know I am not the only one going through this. It seems like they worry about it too much, but when your constipated it makes you feel terrible. My mom has emphysema copd, so it makes it harder on her breathing when she is constipated. I try to give her a high fiber eng muffin every day and sometimes raisin bran does the trick, if that fails we do stool softeners. But I do understand how obsessive they get on wether or not they had a BM or not and glad I am not the only one having a daily discussion about it. Have a great day!
Helpful Answer (0)
Report

LOL...Sorry to laugh, but Mom does the same thing. As soon as we get the BM's under control, up pops another issue. Phantom pains that she can't quite tell me where they are located. If we get the pain controlled then she's upset because she can't figure out the remote. Tells me I keep changing them on her. I don't think there is anyway to please elderly people.

Is it just me, or are aging parents really just 2 year olds with a better vocabulary?
Helpful Answer (0)
Report

1 2 3
This question has been closed for answers. Ask a New Question.
Related
Questions