I moved my Mom across the country to live near me and my husband over 3 years ago. There was no one at home that wanted to help her out. Now, she says that she wants to find an ALF in her home state and move there soon. (Several family members have passed away recently and I think this is her way of dealing with it.) She does not want to involve my sib who hasn't been to visit her since she moved here. My fear is that she is idealizing going "back home" and thinks that caregivers will somehow magically appear. Part of the problem is that we have done everything for her here and she does not realize how much is involved in keeping someone safe and healthy.
If I knew that my sib would step up or that she would really be okay I could just let her go. What should I do?