she has a wonderful caretaker- from an agency who comes fri-tues am- but showers are a battle.but has to be done and she is able to stand for a short time, she no longer has to be sponged- in bed- but its a battle-and she becomes so nasty- and mean- i believe control is part of the issue- but as dementia tends to alter ones reallity- and hers is so distorted- how do u deal with it? less talking, more just doing?
she tells me-" u dont know what they are doing to me-taking my clothes off-and taking me outside in the street- call the police- call the agency- this woman is terrible-"i understand, perception is your reality
and her is frightening at times, but how do u talk to someone to calm them- agree with the -change the subject?-ignore them? i love my mom, but even i cant take it sometimes when she is so lfrustrated that she cant control her anger and starts in on me- how horrible i am-how could her own daughter be so selfish- with me, it never matters what i
have done or am doing- it eentually becomes a stream of insults and then she wants to stay in bed and not move-she canmove-now that she has come home from the hospital- but she tends to want to do nothing- and she needs to move around so that she doesnt lose the ability to move-
anyone have any suggestions or similar experiences?
i dappreciate any kind of advise,thisis just the middle of a processthat i am told will just get worse-i must learn how to handle it-
thanks for your time- k