How to ease Mom's transition from home care to nursing home?


I keep telling myself she can't help it.Knowing intellectually is one thing but the effect of constant bombardment is not softened by this knowledge.Every minute of every day is controlled by Altz.

Last night we were out to dinner.Nice(except we were tired and really didn't feel like going -but- it was already scheduled)..When we were finished we had to figure out how to kill an hour because the caretaker was scheduled until 10pm.Takes joy and spontinaiety out of everything.
I could go on but have you noticed? no one wants to hear my complaining .Martyrs are such a bore.My fifties are gone,Time is the one thing you can't go out and get more of.I owe myself,my husband and my daughter some of me too.Getting old sucks!

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Yes, so good to hear such an open and honest post. I know what you are saying. When my MIL lived with us with Alz., my family did suffer the consequences. Your husband and daughter most definetly need you. It's like being pulled in all directions; I often felt I was becoming undone. Taking care of MIL at our home and mother in nursing home.

It's true as 195Austin said, people don't want to hear it; and truly don't get it unless they have been through it. And everyone here has a different scenario, some worse than others. But, we all do care, so venting is good for the soul. Bless you for all you do and take care.
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I had almost lived in NH with my husbands at least 16 short rehab stays and I never saw a resident not adjusting to being in a nursing home-plus visited often a friend in a nh for 13 years-every day for a while. It is true your friends do not want to hear what you have to say about caregiving but we here get it Come here and tells us how you are doing-we are all caregivers or former caregivers so we can offer support and care.
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