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My father has dementia the meds have him ouy there. but he has to be on them or he will go after my mom for cheating on him while walking the dog [the dog died 31 yrs ago]. so even though hes kind of out of it . what would be good to do for him on fathers day

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What was the norm for father's day in the past? Could you do something similar, but scaled down to a more simple level? My mom has dementia, & of course doesn't keep up with what day it is too well, so on special days, we make special notices of the day. Happy mother's day on her daily schedule, card's rec'd. On the mantle or coffee table, favorite foods at each meal all day-"such & so food for your m-day breakfast/lunch/dinner. We add a little sign to the plant on the K-table made by folding an Index card over a BBQ skewer & glueing or taping together. If a cookout, maybe buy paper plates that say "happy father's day", matching napkins to use all day. You get the idea. Keep him oriented to the day, keep the actual event simple, but related to what dad's day would have been like in the
past, and the focus on him as a good n special dad. Adjust the environment to his functioning that day. If he becomes upset, calm things down, if he's groggy
play some music from his era at a moderate volume.

If dad is sleeping all the time on the (psych?) med's. You might want to talk to doc about that. If pm dose, taking a little earlier may help, or doc might want dose adjustment or trial of another med. Hopefully by working w prescriber, you can together find a balance between paranoia and missing out on life. Also, sometimes may just need a longer time to get used to med's-you didn't say how long this has been going on or exactly what you meant by "out of it", hope I got your intending meaning!
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