How do I deal with my mother who is a manipulator, wants 24/7 care, and keeps telling me that I owe her?
After my dad passed away a year ago my mother came to live with me...At first it wasn't so bad, but it has become a nightmare! She refuses to do anything for herself, wants to sit in the recliner and be catered to. I work, and go to school, my daughter has been helping me with her as much as she can and I pay my granddaughter to stay with her the weekends I work..I am a nurse at the county jail and I work 7p-730a. Literally, my mother is draining me of my life. I have lost friends and now,she is doing the best she can to separate me from my kids/grandkids, and my ex-husband who is wanting to work things out with me.
She is a manipulator. She knows what buttons to push and does it to me NON_STOP!. for eample-- my son and I went out shopping for a patio set for my backyard -- we decided to stop and get a bite to eat. We were gone for 3 hrs max -- SHE CALLED 911 AND TOLD THEM HER CHILD WAS MISSING, AND SHE HAD BEEN LEFT ALONE WITH NO FOOD. When my son and I got back she was hysterical..HOw could I disappear and not call her, etc. thats when the cops showed up and I was livid! Now, my son avoids coming here and has told me that he won't do anything with me because of her.The woman is crazy. I don't have the heart to stick her in a nursing home BUT I can't do this much longer before it takes a toll on me.She has run off the OT, the home health aide, and the visiting nurse. She wants me to sit here 24/7. She has a fit when I go out to run my errands --"who's going to take care of me?" She is NOT as needy as she proclaims. I am 55yrs old and she is 85...I keep telling her I have a life and she keeps telling me "You owe me." She is driving me crazy. I can't take this anymore. I need some advice. Her doctor gave me xanax to give her--it doesn't help unless I give her more than what he prescribed and I can't legally do that..HELP!