garyscott Asked May 2014

Is it common for Dad to be obsessed with dates, times, appointments, etc?

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My dad is obsessed with his calendar and calls constantly about events that are to happen. Should I not tell him of upcoming events?

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lmb1234 May 2014
I'm with all the folks here who have said that a calendar often doesn't help much. If I've heard my mother say once I've heard it 10,000 times when she calls to ask me a question multiple times..."I didn't look at the calendar" or "I should have written it down." She's not going to do either and to hear those comments over and over make me want to just tear my own hair out after awhile. So, less is more as most folks are saying and whatever keeps everyone calm and works best is the way to go.
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1tired May 2014
We went the giant calendar route as well, in his room. So he could write the times of ball games, when the Italian Club met and most important when he would bathe. Alas, he would write down when he showered when he did not do it and it caused a problem.
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sktingley1 May 2014
I use a whiteboard with the week's appointments on it so the folks and the caregivers can all be aware of the schedule. They used to call frequently to ask about appointments but after a few time of me telling them-What does it say on the board-they quit calling and check the board on their own. Caregivers can also put schedule changes on there for all to see.

I also have a 8 1/2x 11 write-on/wipe-off calender beside my Dad's bed (each month I fill in the month and dates info) so that each morning he can cross off the new day. Since i've been doing this, he can tell me the month, day and date.
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twotonne May 2014
My husband seemed to be obsessing over time, dates, checkbook entries, and anything with numbers. He would watch TV weather and tell me the temperature or wind speeds. He told me the date every morning using numbers. We picked up the grandkids after school and he would watch the time and tell me when it was time to go. I mentioned all this to his doctor and a few other odd things like an excellent sense of direction in a strange town. He ordered a new series of scans, CT and PET. From the symptoms and the new scans, he gave a new diagnosis. My husband didn't have AD, he had FTD. His fixation on numbers was because his language center was severely affected and all he understood clearly was numbers. He no longer could read or speak clearly(he only used pronouns, not nouns) and couldn't follow story lines on TV. So he talked about what he did know, numbers and directions! So then, when he would look at the clock and say, "We got to go over there now to get them," I knew why.
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my mom,92, worried about everything with the day,time,and appts.....i got a huge wipe off calendar..i write in all the days, then dr. appts. in one color, then who is her caregiver in another color, etc.,....it must be big and consistant each month......then we have one marker that we use to mark off the days...this works great!!!!
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Nana2Nanny May 2014
@Mary11 its important not to ask questions on another members question as it can end up taking away from the original post members need. Would also love to answer but not here.
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This is for Mary11. You have a good question there, please post it in a separate thread so people will notice and give some answers an advice specific to that issue. I will be very interested to read what they say.
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Nana2Nanny May 2014
Very common- his memory is fading and he is trying to keep up with "life". I bought mom an extra large Calendar and filled in all birthdays etc- whatever dates are important and if we schedule events or appts I fill those in immediately. She keeps it by her chair and looks thru it often. Simple solution- she loves butterflies so I got her a butterfly calendar. Whats dad like?
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Mary11 May 2014
My spouse has dementia and has gotten so obsesses with money, spending it on the lottery and anything he wants and everything is about him only. Have any of you been through this.
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kcandrick May 2014
I agree with all....wait until the last hours or even minutes before an appointment or notification of a friends/family impending visit. Otherwise, their paranoia about being prepared just sets them in a tailspin (and you as well, after having to answer their repeated questions or concerns)
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