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My dad is not incontinent but when he uses the urinal or bed side commode he often gets urine on his clothing. When I want him to change his clothing he tells me I'm being ridiculous that it is nothing. This issue more then anything drives me crazy. It is getting to the point that these daily arguments are wearing on me and I'm considering putting him in a nursing home. I would rather care for him but I can't take these daily arguments. The thought of him laying on his bed with urine soaked pants grosses me out and yet it doesn't bother him at all. Any advice?

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ALL urine is a health hazard. It's WASTE! Change the clothes, change the sheets and clean up the surrounding area. Like I said, Just do it.


Been there, done that, N1K2R3
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Call the his doctor and tell him/her about the situation(s). Ask him/her if you can tell your dad that the doctor said it is a health hazard, and he should change his underwear and/or day/night clothes. I'm sure the doctor won't mind if you have to use him/her to get your dad to change his underwear and/or clothes. My MIL's doctor didn't mind, in fact her doctor encouraged it. (That was the only way my MIL would do it).
...but since my MIL had incontinence to the point that a pad wouldn't be enough to hold it--she had to be switched to disposable underwear, e.g. Depends. Super-Plus is much more absorbant than Extra-Absorbancy. When she got to 'Gush-mode' where I was doing 2-3 loads/day just for her, we looked into 'Tranquility' disposable underwear (DU). It holds a quart of liquid per DU and can be gotten either by going online and ordering it or a medical supply store. Ordering by the case is less expensive. My DPOA SIL got a waterproof mattress protector that zips for the mattress and one for the boxspring. She also picked up waterproof pillow protectors with zips for the pillows. That way if she ever had a gusher that went thru to the sheets, all I had to do was wipe it down with Lysol wipes and let it air dry. Oh, also, she got a waterproof mattress pad to go on top of the sheets. You can get them at stores (either physically going to the store or online ordering)
e.g. JC Penney's. Waterproof mattress protector with zipper can be gotten at Wal-Mart. I'm sure if you ask the store manager where you live if they carry them, he'll/she'll tell you. If not, maybe that person can order them in for you. Good luck!
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Change his clothes. Don't ask, don't tell. Just do it.
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I would eliminate any clothing impeding his peeing ability. If he'd wear light weight loose cotton pajama bottoms without underwear, it may speed up the process and any drips would dry faster. It's also a quicker change if there's more than a few drops. Someone posted spraying their mom with Fabreese because of the urine smell and not wanting to change her clothes\sheets, I would have to go back and see if it inspired a clothing change or just helped with the smell.

Hang in there and try not to let it get to you, pick your battles and stand firm on the things that matter most. Wish you the best.
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Well now, if it's just a little pee and he doesn't stink, then let him be. If on the other hand he's rolling in urine, then that becomes a health hazard, so you tell him it's a catheter or clean clothes, his choice.
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