How can I convince my mom that in order to stay in her house, she needs to at least try using a caregiver to help with errands, laundry, etc?

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You say, "Mom in order for you to stay in your house we need to find you some help". period. I don't know why it has to be traumatic to tell her she needs assistance. But then again, I don't know your mom. :)
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I could have written this post myself a year ago. It is my Mom's wish to live in her "own space." Of course, she can only do this with a lot of help from us. When it became too much for us, we suggested a paid caregiver come in once and awhile. Her immediate reaction was, "I don't want strangers in my home." So I did some research and found two reputable agencies. The one agency even sent out the owner to speak with her. He "hand picked" someone he thought Mom would feel comfortable with and introduced her to Mom. That really helped Mom feel better about the whole thing. I used to schedule appts. for Mom, now she calls and schedules them herself! I think it is also good for her to have another person to interact with.
good luck

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