Should I let sleeping dogs lie? Should I communicate with estranged family members?

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My brother was horrible to dad before mom died. He was the poa at the time and stole everything. Now dad wants me to contact him and tell him about his latest health condition. He was horrible to me too and I dont want to have anything to do with him. But I don't want to let dad down. During my brothers time as poa he not only cleaned out bank accounts, he took all of mom and dads possessions. He was very hostile to dad, my sister and me. I'm torn. Part of me says send him a text or postcard and another part says to hell with him. Dad knows about the money but we didn't ever tell him about the stuff.

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Top Answer
Please just do as your dad asks. Maybe you should also tell him how hard it is for you to do so; but do as your dad asks. You'll never regret what does or does not happen with your brother, but you do not want to regret what you did with and for your dad. Honor his wishes.
cupcake, sounds like your dad is reaching out to your brother, and he's forgiven him about the money. As far as the other stuff brother did, don't know exactly how important that is for your dad to know, you'll have to decide I guess.
Cupcake Im kinda in same situation My MIL lives with my husband & I since 2011 which we found out her oldest daughter {my husbands sister} WAS taking her money for her own good and when we took over POA she was done with us all there are 4 siblings all together the other sister helps us out the brother stops by all the time and the one sister acts like we all did something then her daughters came to c grandma told there mom that she needs to next thing I know she threatening to call welfare if I dont let her mom call her... I let MIL know she wanted her to call for 3 days she fiannly did. My MIL knows about money but she has dementia and thats her daughter probaly forgave anyway her daughter called mon, wanting to know if she could bring her mom to c her mom. I said yes they came yesterday I stayed in house weird awkward I guess she talked bad stuff all the way home but you know what at least my MIL got to c her daughter even if that daughter is a phsyco crazy woman lol I mean sometimes we just have to be bigger person . YOUr brother might not come or respond but you could try for your dad.
Can you just dial his number and hand the phone to your dad? Is there some reason you must call?

Sometimes it's healthy to forgive someone, but not restore the relationship. I understand if you're there. But I also understand if your father wants all of his children in his life. I can't imagine being estranged from my child.

I saw this the other day and it gave me a good laugh: Sometimes giving someone a second chance is like giving them another bullet for their gun when they missed you the first time.

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