I have been caring for wife for last 4 years and the only things that matter now are her and her family. Where do I turn when my family doesn't matter at all?
After broken shoulder, gall bladder surgery, fibromyalgia, bad knees and arthritis of spine andlgl leukemia. She is bedridden for nearly a year now, can't even sit up without assitance let alone use commode by bed, so diaper changes all time. Have nurse once a week and therapy 3 times week, after 45 days in nursing home which showed no improvement. I have become very resentful of taking care of her with no help from anyone, Nurse and therapy will stop coming soon and I will be totally alone again. I fly off in a tirade at the slightest things. Have not been physically violent yet but i can see it coming. She is as good as she will ever be in my eyes, and I am getting worse with each passing day. I cannot take this anymore, I want a life. she is 72 I am 62 and still working so needless to say I am always exhausted physically and mentall, which she does not understand. I don't think I will be able to contain myself much longer. What do I do, where do I turn? With all her physical ailments, she can't even get sit up in bed by herself. Now I have to give her meds to her one pill at a time andmake sure she takes them as she is unable to do it on her own. And she takes only one at a time and takes quite a while with each pill which agravates me to no end, i don't have time for this, especially in mornings when I have to get ready for work. I am at wits end and need relief one way or another. She is also a hoarder, which has been a brutal battle for years, she has stolen my life from me living in a warehouse not a home, and I am very
hateful about it all. I have no life, no one even been in our house for 20 years except her family. I have managed to clean the kitchen out, which has become my safe haven but as soon as i go there, she starts hollering for me, which i ignore alot. Is only a matter of time before I dont know what is going to happen. But I know it is coming. Im 62 I have a chance for some type of life yet. I have no friends to call on, because of her hoarding and her family is all that matters to her, mine are, according to her, nothing at all. Where do i turn, what do i do, how can i control me and not end up ------------?