What happens when you call adult protective services?

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I've got a situation where my mother refuses all outside or paid help and wants only family to do things for her. There are a number of things family can't do her because of the people involved and distances, and a self-neglect situation is slowly building. I'm wondering when the apparently inevitable day comes when I call APS what will happen? How much legal control can they take over my mother's life and her home? I want her to get help or be forced to accept help (she sure won't listen to me!) but I fear her being railroaded or losing more independence than necessary. Will I be starting a process that could end badly? Please share your experiences with APS good and bad, thank you!

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sheba - I don't think it matters if it's considered abuse or not. Why haven't you just kicked him out? Or if it's his place, move out yourself? He sounds like a nightmare to live with.
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I live with my son. He is 22. He calls me vulgar names, has removed my bedroom door, turned off water to the toilet and untwisted my light bulbs. Is this considered abuse.?
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Don't, under any circumstances, call adult protective services. They are awful. I don't know how to advise you to deal with your mother's problems, but APS will only make matters worse. I know, having cared for my aging parents until their deaths, and having a blind sister who needs in home care. APS can turn the normal aging process into a criminal charge, and I mean that. Do your best as a family to care for each other. Try to get a little help from neighbors. Be very careful who you let into your house My very best wishes to you.
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how do i end this investigation if my mother doesnt say no to it?
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mom has always been my friend. then she was cohearsed by neice to allow her to come bk to her home from prison. she had said no a million times as she was abused by her grandaughter for 3 yrs! then she got sentenced, when parole off said she can come bk mom said hell no shes dead to me. then she weedled her way bk in and while in prison she had called aps on ME I live 500 miles from home but i was caretaking both parents for 10 yrs! Now mom is supposedly the victim of my abuse (niece called it financial abuse) a the while she has given her two thousand dollars for truck school. niece tricked me into calling as i hadnt for first time as i was going through hell for a wk. To my surprise she had cohearsed my mom into areeing to file investigation of harrassment. I wasnt harrassing her, my niece was and the whole family got angry that she allowed the controlling abuser bk into her home. But the investigator said that I raise her bp another lie, and so I should for the firstt time in my life have NO contact! shes 90 and doesnt know she controls the investigation and can just say NO way is my daugter abusing me.she acts like shes supposed to talk to her as a thearapist. she never told anyone but me how horible niece was, but I was there and I saw it for yrs! along with her sister they scream yell use her cars take charge of heer finances and now niece says im a jerk and she cant believe mom helps me. NO we all cant believe shes still helping the gradaughters. Its madness I have never been out of touch with my mom. Now niece says its HER mom and HEr househould! She siply must think i had something to do with moms decision to say no to allowing her bk and/or its about her again having a free place to live! She is so ugly to me it is shocking as all I eveer said was hey dont talk to my mom that way. Now she texts her sister saying i just threatened to kill her..again. she making things up for court or something. I dont know but my entire family refuses to speak to me. im elder im alone im disabled. and the plan was for me to come bk and care for her and rent my home to bring in some money. that is over now since im the so called abuser? sociopathic narcissistic control freak neice has control over her mind and its killing me! How do i fight this I never got a notice nor have i been served. when she gave me the invvestigators number she said what i told her not to give out my number. i said well she isnt going to listen to anyone! then i told her she was a convict on parole and what she did to get a 100000 bail and 20 yr sentene!. But she still said no contact now. im at a loss and alone totally heartbroken I have never been out of touh with her. she may die in this time frame. what can i do i begged via email for my siblings to tell my om she can call this off anytime but no one answered me!
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Is there any legal ramifications for the family?
My mother just got discharged from a skilled nursing facility after we told them she was unable to vare for herself. She just had a colostomy bag pit on snd and is on physicatric drugs. We dont know what to do
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My Mother has Dementia and she refuses to have any help, anyone that comes to her house she just sends them away her memory is getting worse so she is neglecting herself and the house little by little, I live 13 hrs away and tried different ways to help her but nothing works. I don't know if I should call A P S or not. This is really upsetting to me.
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I had P0A first and twice my middle sister had my dad revoke my power of ATTORNEY and had him turn it over to her can she do this to me . he has some dementia I feel she took advantage of him what can I do? plus she will not allow him to speak to me . what are my rights she wont allow him to see me.
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Sometimes it is a matter of feeding the systems the words they need to hear, so they'll even come look.

For instance:
People where we used to live, called police and CPS repeatedly over a couple years' time, got no responses:
We occasionally helped an abused single mother w/ 3 little kids, by sheltering her. [[yes, he did retaliate]]
She usually left her kids in the apartment w/the abuser, believing they'd be fine, despite my warnings.
I called CPS to report that. CPS never responded.
Many neighbors avoided calling, fearing retaliation by abuser--but called police to report sounds of violent abuses happening at her apartment--no responses.
Reports of chronic drug activity in apartment--no response.
Including reporting that man was conducting drug activity in back bedroom where kids slept at night= no responses.
Child trying to escape from balcony, hanging over concrete driveway, got no response, except by neighbors helping child to get down off balcony without crashing himself--but then what?? return him to the apartment??
Children outside in inadequate clothing for weather--no response.
Baby crawling away down sidewalk--repeatedly--no responses.
Last straw was, woman sheltering at our house, said "my boyfriend has been taking my welfare checks and food stamps, sometimes for his drug stuff".
I called Welfare and CPS, reported that statement, and they got there so fast, it was like they'd been visiting next door!
THEN, woman and her kids were removed to another city 60 miles away for safety, man evicted from apartment.

Anyone can contact Police [non-emergency #],
also APS, also State Attorney General offices,
to request copies of descriptions of what each department classes as "abuse" conditions =that they must respond and intervene= for.

When reporting, use that same language, so agents can recognize what they are supposed to be observing.
Officers can only report what they see/hear.

But a report must be generated when 911 is called--that is a paper trail, and, it eventually accumulates data trails that can substantiate things,
which can lead to a person being removed from the circumstances,
even if the single-observations are not enough or conclusive enough by themselves.
ALSO, these reports can lead to getting better, more usable information as to how a caregiver can get the elder better helped
--because often, the 1st person contacted is new at it, or badly informed, or simply overloaded.
...eventually, you find someone with more/better information, and get better results.
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Wow, I am reading all your posts and it is such a shame that our aging parents are treated this way. However I feel your frustration. I just contacted APS on my mother. After being in the hospital for a week she had to go home to a man ( not husband just significant) who is so gross. The dishes from what I was told have not been washed in weeks. I have seen her house that bad before and I had to leave my son in the car because I did not want him in there. Anyway, APS went and spoke to her while she was in the hosptial and this guy at her home and they told me that there is nothing they can do because she is in her right mind. Even though she is making unhealth judgements because she knows her name and birthday they won't do anything. She got released on Monday, on Tuesday night my sister went over there and my mom was crying because of the mess she refused to get help from my sister. AS my sister was leaving she could hear this man screaming at my mother. My sister called the cops and they did nothing. I live 5 hours away. My sister has caregiver burnout and can not handle much more. I don't know what else to do. She thinks this man loves her but he is neglecting her so badly that one day she will not wake up. She will not come up here, every day I ask her. I feel as if all I can do is just sit here for the day that she completely looses her mind then have the courts award her in our care.
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