What can my 93-year-old mother do for activities when she is suffering from dementia, macular degeneration, hearing loss, and not much coordination?

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We sit with her, walk her around, but she cannot stand to be left alone for 2 minutes. Recently altered her meds, so she is more calm. We are stumped. Will try anything. Already do some exercising, put a ball in her hand to squeeze and strengthen, leg stretches. She cannot dress herself or feed her self--she drops what she is holding, and cannot see the food on her plate. Does anyone have any ideas? We are all a little nutty from sitting around. Thank you!

Answers 1 to 10 of 22
Get an IPOD or something like that and download her favorite music onto it. Or, get some books on tape that you think she'd like, and plug her in.
Yes, i have tried that. The earphones bother her, and she wears hearing aids. I have tried without the aids, too. She is very out of it and it's hard for her to relate to anything that she must participate in. Thank you, and we will keep on trying!
Top Answer
shes 93 yrs old , shes lived a long life . she s tired and worn out . just leave her alone .
my dad is 87 yrs old and he sleeps alot , i would say hey dad raise ur leg up , we re going to excerise , he just stares at me and said no im too tired ,
all i can do for him is to hold his hand or sit with him and watch tv , talk to him . sit at the kitchen table to be with him .
theyre like babies all over again . all you can do is to give them love and give them the best care you can .
while he s napping , i go do my housework or im on here . when hes awake i go and hang out with good ole dad .
getting up to go bathroom wears my dad out . wears me out too .
theyre just tired and worn out ....
Thanks Linda:) she never naps. The caregivers and I do sit with her for hours. If you get up to go to the bathroom, fix her lunch, vacuum, whatever: she can't stand it. Doesn't want to be left alone for a minute. Can't be with her own thoughts.
You are a Saint, one of God's Angels on earth, and I mean it.
Love, christina
you too christina . xoxo
Try play doh or something she can fiddle with. They say it is also calming for dementia patients.
btw, my mom is 90 and has the same issues. I am continuing to research and finding a number of good ideas. Another is a spelling bee and a fill in the blank game with idioms such as "don't count your chickens before they _______". Good luck to you!!
Hi, highrider! Yes, the nursery rhymes and song lyrics we can do!! She and I are both vocalists, and we can find a song lyric for just about any situation, and then laugh! This cannot go on all day long, however, and every day. haha The caregivers take her to the library once a month, and get books about animals, chicken soup for the soul collections, and I have a lot of books from when my kids were small, but those are not always interesting to her, or appropriate. Now that she is on a new med so she is not so impatient, jumpy, and needy, finding a balance and things to occupy her is a bit easier! Thank you so much for your ideas! Also--she hates to get anything on her HANDS!!! Freak out!! :D Christina xo
Can she follow a story or article? I understand that the Library of Congress has a very simple-to-operate audio player and not only books but magazines and newspapers recorded for it. Could she follow shorter stories and articles? Would having it play loudly without a headset drive the rest of you crazy? There is no cost to use this.

Have you looked at "fidget" toys and tactile toys designed for those with dementia? The Alzheimer's Store is one source, or do a Google search. They're just things to occupy the hands or give some comfort. But they might offer some diversion.

Could she fold washclothes? We use washclothes as single-use hand towels, so we have 3 to 5 laundry loads of them per week. My husband (dementia, 85) has the job of folding them. He holds a shallow box on his lap and smooths a "towel" out, folds it in quarters, and puts it in a pile. If he is having a good day he also moves them from the stacks into the baskets we place on the bathroom vanity, but often I do that part. I understand that a repetitive action, and a textured surface (like terry cloth), and different colors, can all be appealing. It also gives him the feeling of making a contribution -- which it in fact does!

And also I'd consider Linda's attitude. I don't think Mother needs to be busy all the time. Sitting quietly together is OK, too.

If she doesn't want to be left alone, and surely sometimes it is necessary to leave her alone, I wonder if the technique for leaving young children in a hospital would apply? "Mommy has to go talk to the doctors and nurses now. While I'm gone I want you to hold this pretty scarf of mine. When I come back I'll put it around my neck again." Would it comfort your mother to have something of yours to hold while you are not with her?

You are doing a labor of love, Christina, and I hope you are experiencing many rewarding moments.
My Mom has the same physical problems She doesn't like "strangers" comong into her house even is they are there to help her. The Vna Hopice people have been a Godsend,,,,,,they are so patient and giving. Even though Mom doesn't want to give up her independence she accepts their help.
She wants me there all the time but it can get overwhelming. The Vna can offer you help especially if you find someone she really likes.

My thoughts and prayers are with you. I know what youu're going through.

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