What are the "rules" governing an 89-year-old elderly woman leaving her home for an assisted living or nursing home?

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If you are wondering about the money aspect, you should see an estate attorney or an elder law attorney. If she is selling her house, that issue needs to be addressed, and everything with the proceeds needs to be handled legally. Hopefully, she has given someone a Power Of Attorney. If not, that needs to be done.
Carol
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