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This is my husbands Mom and for 2 years he, his 3 sisters and myself have provided 24/7 care and it's getting very hard with our personal lives, work and just the daily stress of keeping her in her home. Is there special help out there to afford her outside care? Having trouble posting what I really wanted to ask! She is a super easy going lady, declining daily and we got to seek help for her and all of us. Suggestions? Resources?
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Yes, call Senior Services and get a social worker. Also , your DR. will give you numbers for your area. When you have no or little money there is so much out there for you. When you have too much, there is nothing. She can get Visiting Nurse and therapy if needed. Also , meals on wheels and other government backed programs. Your local hospital can be a big help too. It all varies by state.
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Of course the kids are split. 1 sister is saying she is can't do it anymore and the other two sisters are saying she has to pay to get someone to cover her time. Mom (in-law) has barely enough to pay for her meds, but her home is paid for. Will her children be held responsible for paying or will it be base on her income solely. She does own her little home, not in the best of shape.
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Thank you so much for your comments, loving daughter, this is so hard, but this sight is very inspirational - we have it easy compared to some. She is so awesome, but I think she gets sick of everyone being there 24.7! Something has to give soon, I hate watching my in-laws fall away from each other like this. So much guilt for all of them. I want to wave a wand and fix this for them so they all can get along. Thanks again, adn I will call Senior Services, or get my husband to...sticky situation being the only daughter in law!...but I'm her favorite! :)
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Beck,
Siblings are not responsible for a parents bills. Her care and qualifications for that care rest solely on her financial ability to pay. The less money, the more care she will receive.
Once you need hospice, they will take much of the burden from you. Dad had it for 16 months. He was the poster boy , mascot. They all loved him . You may not need this yet, but when you do, I can guarantee that they are truly angels on earth.
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You can also call your county Commission on Aging, and they can direct you to some resources. I called every number I could find for months. Call the Department of Human Services. Senior Centers are great places for resources. Sometimes they have volunteers who will come in a clean, or do shopping, or come visit your loved one. They offer rides, meals, activities, free legal advice, dental care, flu shots, and much more. Your phone book is filled with resources. You can get visiting nurses, the Health Department can do medications, etc. Churches sometimes have volunteers, and then there are Day Care for the elderly, and respite available, as well. You'd be surprized how much there is out there. Best wishes, take care.
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