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I live with my fiancee' in his house. His mother has an apartment downstairs and is very independent. I do not want to take that away from her so i am her full time caregiver. I take care of everything for her. I encourage her to do things on her own. It is working out pretty well. The problem is that I rarely get out of the house unless it is on an errand for the family. I make sure she has her meds, and that she takes her meds accordingly. I make sure she has groceries and cook for her often. I keep her clothes washed, and have now started bathing her and washing her hair, cutting her nails, and any and all other hygene related tasks regarding that area. I take care of her pets, one dog and one cat. I take care of the garden which she enjoys so much. I make sure she has appropriate clothing. I get her to the doctor when that is necessary, to the dentist, to the eye doctor. I try to keep her apartment clean. In other words, I do practically everything for her. I absolutely adore her and we spend time together just talking. She loves to talk about her past and I enjoy hearing the stories.

Her apartment was built to be very safe - all electric so not to worry about carbon monoxide poising or fire.

I am totally disabled and am receiving a measly $698.00 per month to pay bills, buy groceries, etc. which leaves not much left to do anything with.

My question is whom do I contact to see about getting so type of salary or payment for all that I do as a full time care giver. It takes a lot more out of a person than I ever imagined possible.

I cannot go outside to home to try for a part-time job, because I have to make sure she doesn't get out of the house and wonder off. (That happened once and I WILL NEVER GO THROUGH THAT AGAIN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!)

So please, if someone out there can point me in the right direction to get some information, I would be eternally grateful.

THANK YOU, GOD BLESS YOU, AND MAY GOD SMILE ON YOU AND KEEP YOU SAFE.

Most sincerely thankful, I am
Wendy

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First, what is MIL's financial status? Does she have assets? Does she get a monthly check -- SS, pension, etc.?

If she can afford it, she should pay you. That is pretty straight forward. It is best to have a written agreement spelling out what you do and what she pays you so that it will not be counted as a "gift" later.

If she cannot afford to pay you -- she has no assets or income, or very little -- then she is probably eligible for some financial aid. The first step would be to apply for the aid, and then whatever care is to be provided you arrange to get paid for providing it. For example, my disabled brother is being paid for cleaning my mother's apartment, because she is eligible for that through Medicaid's Elderly Waiver program.

How do you know what MIL might qualify for? We called the county Social Services office and asked for an intake assessment.

Good luck to you, Wendy!
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Hi Wendy. I don't know much about getting paid but you are so correct that it is a job a fulltime job and all caretakers need a rest. You must look into the area agencies and see if you can get some help. Does she offer to pay you anything? Caretakers make great money nowadays. I hope you get some rest too as I only know too well the toll it could take on someone.
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Also be sure to check how is would affect your disability. In most cases, people get disability because they are unable to work. I don't know how being employed would affect your specific case. I don't know the laws when it comes to disability.
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Wendy..if anything you need to call the Area of Aging and Disabilities in your area and see if she qualifies for a homecare aide to give you a break. They also will pay for some supplies if her income level is low enough. My mom and I just got set up through her income and they will buy depends, poise pads, bed pads and anything that is related to her care medically. Plus we get 20 hours a month of home care aide to come sit with her to give me some time to myself. They will do light housekeeping, meal preparations and bathe if you need them. Go online and check ..you might find some pretty resourceful agencies out there to help you.
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I wish I could help you but I just do not know the answer. Hopefully you can find one and if you do please share with the forum so others in the future do not feel as helpless as you do. God bless you!!!
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Thank all of you so much, I am touched that there are some decent people out there that would take the time to help me.

It's a rare occurrence these days that there are still compassionate folks out there.

May GOD Bless you all and your families, protect you from harm, and be with you and yours throughout the season.

Again, I thank you all.
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Wendy, I am a compassionate folk and would love to help if I could. Are you getting a disability check such as social security disability check? If not, maybe you should look into it and start applying for it, plus Medicare for yourself.
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