Charles53 Asked September 2010

How can I get paid or get financial help to keep our home and keep caring for my dad?

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I am in WV, my aging parents live with me and my wife and we can't work for caring for my parents and she takes care of her mother several times a week. Mom just passed away and without her income we can no longer live here. How can I get paid or get financial help to keep our home and keep caring for my dad. My dad's social security is not enough alone. Since we are not working I don't see how we can even have my dad rent us an apartment at his age and illnesses..We need help.

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EXPERT Ralph Robbins Sep 2010
Honestly, you are asking the wrong question. It is impossible for you to care for all three of you on just your father's Social Security. You and your wife need to make money and take care of yourselves. Period. Whatever you have to do, you do.
Your dad's funds should be used for his care - not yours!
That being said, your father may qualify for Medicaid and if he is an eligible veteran he may be able to receive a non-service connected pension of up to $1,650 per month.
Contact your county Agency on Aging and the local Veteran Service Office.
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Charles53 Sep 2010
Thank you..the reason I cannot work is that he cannot be left alone..He has mild dementia and today was my mom's funeral. He cannot be left alone so I and my wife has to take care of him plus she has to take care of her mom too. Dad's social security is too much for him to qualify for Medicaid so we are the kind that fall between the cracks..too much for assistance but not enough to live on. DHHR in WV has already told me at 53 I'm virtually unemployable..and no one would keep me hired when I would have to leave work and take care of him several times a week.
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PirateGal Sep 2010
Yeah Ralph it's not as easy as you say when you are all alone and frustrated and frightened. Many of these agencies don't even help. Seems you have to be practically penniless to have Medicaid. Don't be so rough on us, many of us are struggling.....dealing with Dementia patients is a strain on one's self trying to deal with an unstable mind...it's not like we are trained in elder psychology. Adult day cares charge a lot. Please don't mention churches..not everyone goes or belongs to a church. Seems there is really no help out there for us dealing with the aging population..it's all over the news but no one is stepping up to the plate coming up with more solutions and programs. Seems their is a blind eye being put to this growing situation. We the caregivers are taking a big toll with our lives, monies and health dealing with these older folks that are becoming terribly harder to take care of in these times of a 2 PERSONS have to work family life.
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Charles53 Sep 2010
He was a veteran but got discharged right before the Korean War started so he did not serve anytime during war time. I talked to DHHR today and because of his income he does not qualify for any type of care. We may just have to try to get a one bedroom apartment for him, I sleep in the living room and my wife will just have to go stay with her mom. We are those kinds of people that fall between the cracks, make too much for any assistance but not enough to live on.
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Charles53 Sep 2010
I didn't ask them yet. I don't mind, His income is 1850 a month, counting social security and union pension. We live in a double wide mobile home in a trailer park and it is in my name. We are not behind on any mortgage yet. Mom's death was sudden and we don't have the money for next month's mortgage. I checked and no one will refinance or extend or anything a loan on a mobile home - no equity in a double wide.
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Charles53 Sep 2010
Ok great..I'll try that tomorrow and see what happens and let you know..do they provide financial assistance? That is what we need. WV did have a program that pays people to be care givers, even children to be a caregiver of their parents but our legislature never funded it this year and the waiting list was closed.
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PirateGal Sep 2010
Ralph I know its good to give us some ommpf...I agree but it is tough out here. I know when I began my journey a year ago...I called all kinds of places and go no where really fast. I really wish that the new Heatlhcare program has a program dealing with SOLEY THIS SUBJECT - ELDER CARE.
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Charles53 Sep 2010
I checked and we do not qualify for Medicaid and since that, there are no services they know of to help us. The WV Legislature never funded the program this year that pays siblings to care for their parents and they cut off the waiting list. We looked at a 1 bedroom apartment that has one small living room, very dark bathroom and small kitchen for $550 a month..can't afford that. I told my dad we may just have to go to the homeless shelter and let my wife move in with her mom. Her mom wants to keep her big nice home to herself and really don't want her daughter moving in. So we will end up being just another homeless statistic.
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