sunitasharma65 Asked July 2010

How to guard the safety and welfare of my Mom?

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My mother who is 79 ,and is hard of hearing started living with my brother since the end of January 2010.In March he proposed selling her only house to which I raised an objection.He has already taken 1.5 lakh Rupees from her during this time and still pressuring her to sell the house(His argument is that after the death of a person it is a hassle to sell the house to which my answer is that she writes her will so that the house is not sold as long as she is alive but can be sold later.He is misbehaving with me also so that I am not able to communicate with my mother.My mother is feeling pressured but is scared of taking a stand given her situation.Help me.I wrote emails to all my brothers including this one to sort out the matter but the eldest does not want to do anything and the middle one is ready partially to help with her but is not coming out to say the right thing.

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I don't think there are any elder care agencies here in India(Delhi/Gurgaon).I live in US and she lives in India.The only danger that I see currently is that once the house is sold she has nowhere to go to in case the need arises.She was with me in US from Sep 2009 to January 2010 where I got her checked by a Psychiatrist who diagnosed her with Dementia.(She hears voices that are not there)I am concerned that with the progression of the disease she may not even be able to make any sound financial decisions so I made this trip to India this summer but my brother is making it difficult for me to even talk to her.
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MiaMadre Jul 2010
Please provide more information on your mother and her situation. That will help us understand the situation. If your mother is in danger, please contact the authorities immediately. If this is a concern about her overall well-being and current living situation please contact ELDER CARE agencies in your area for specific help.

What is your mothers living arrangements?
How Old is your mother?
What are her medical concerns/conditions?
What medications is your mother on?
How did you become made aware of her plight?
Are you living with your mother?
If not, Do you live near enough to her to visit?
Did you feel she is in immediate danger?

These are but a few questions I would ask, but you don't have to reveal all that information (or any) here online. Just be prepared to offer information to the agency so they can help.

Please advise, so others may offer their view.
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