mytruejulian Asked April 2011

How can I get paid for being a caregiver for your father?

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JollyJ Apr 2011
Oh my goodness! I'm so sorry!

Call your local Council on Aging (look up Aging, it could be called an agency but the aging is the important thing). They will send out a social worker to assess the situation and let you know what help is available.
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I don't know if I understand, do I have to get a lawyer, which I can't afford. I resently lost my employment, and I feel that when unemployment finds out that I am considering being a full time help for my father and brother that that income will be cut. I brought them both to my home last week, on Friday. Yes, my brother who was watching my dad for the last 6 yrs. has also come to live with me, he hasn't been able to work because of my father's total need. I am hoping to be the added assistance that they need. I know we cannot all live on my dad's SSI/disability income. I am getting temporary assistance with food stamps which will be a help, because of my lost of employment, I have a son who will be graduating high school this year, amen. Someone mentioned that we might be able to get assistance with caregiver pay for my father. He is 84 yrs old, has MS, has a catheta, has had surgery on his only one good leg so is unable to walk at all so he is in need of total care. He is only capable of eating small amounts of food on his own (very independent still at his age), because he has arthritis. He can just barely move around in the hover chair that Medicare supplied for him. My brother has to lift him up into the chair (he is dead weight). He stays in his hospital bed the majority of the time. So can someone point us in the direction of how to start applying for Caregiver pay to help with some of the finances.
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TILDA Apr 2011
Hi Jolly J,
My mom is on Medicaide and we also have taken a reverse mortgage and the money goes through a "pool trust" at this point. I keep a calendar as a time sheet. At the end of each day I log in how much time I put towards her tasks. Once a week I add it up and at the end of the month I submit it along with a copy of my calendar page. This has simplified keeping track for me and creates accountability for record keeping. The pool trust is ok with it and Medicaide has legally permitted families to do the same. I believe I read something on this very web page about it. Good luck with it. It can be done without a lawyer I am sure.
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JollyJ Apr 2011
I care for my 95 year old Mom with dementia and my brother, who handles the finances, pays me out of her monthly annuity payment.

Tilda, I don't have a contract but do I need something in writing that would show Medicaid that the money is for services provided? I hope we never have to use Medicaid but Mom is healthy as can be - just the mind is gone.
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TILDA Apr 2011
When I had to leave my full time job and be on call 24/7 for my mom ..back in 2004 I contacted an elder care lawyer and asked him that very question. My loss of income and demand on my energy and time was a real issue. It took me a long time, almost three years to get my brothers to understand my financial difficulty. It was not their isssue and it was an error on my part hoping they would do the right thing and pool resources. The lawyer had suggested I get their cooperation on the gap in finances. What I wound up doing was discussing it with my therapist who helped me draw up a letter which was notarized and signed by my mother. It was an agreement that I would help under certain conditions. The hour rate and the job description was included. ...a very important aspect of it for after a while the lines get blurred.

I am now still doing this work, and even if I only get $10/hour can mange to work for the family part time and be on 24/7 call the rest of the time. Mind you I have had two car accidents since...stress is a terrible distractor...and now have no car and a bad back...but still work for the family as the "go fer" . It is not an easy job but I took it on and now it is way too late to back out. Am at the opposite side of the hill and no one can take over the reigns.

Have managed to share some of the burdens with one of my brothers...he is the executor of the estate after the fact, so I showed him that if he cooperated ahead of time, his burden later would be minimal. If I had to do it all, he would uncover a mess and spend years cleaning it up. Even though it is a management challange dealing with agencies, aids, shopping, cleaning, personal care and health care...all in all ...I have done a great job and now have some serious marketable skills to boot. Some agencies have offered to hire me if I want the job after this job is over...which seems to be before this years end.

My advice would be to write a clear and precise contract first and evaluate it every six months for things change quickly in OZ.
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