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This past March, I took my Mother to a Lawyer (he's related to us) to make out a new Will, make me her Durable Power of Attorney and make a Health Care Directive. How long should this usually take to do? I've called him a few times and I got the feeling that I was bothering him. I haven't said anything to my Mother because I don't want to upset her. Any suggestions on what I should do next?

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Having been an estate planning and elder law attorney for 25 years, and having drafted hundreds of wills, trusts, and powers of attorney for my clients, I would say that a reasonable time for an attorney to complete all these documents would be a few weeks at most. The attorney should advise you at the first meeting how long it will be to complete everything; if things are delayed for some reason, the attorney should be calling YOU to explain why! I don't like the sound of how things are going with this attorney and agree with the others that you may want to try to move on. Unfortunately, if the lawyer has already spent time on your case, he may feel justified in sending you a bill for the time spent to date. You will have to review your agreement with the attorney (if any). Sometimes telling the attorney that you are upset and are considering filing a complaint with the local legal ethics board will (a) light a fire under the attorney or (b) convince the attorney to let you move on and not bill you.

I would not recommend free or online services if you are doing any elder law-type planning as well as a simple will, etc. The online or office supply forms omit all the special provisions you need in such cases and are not worth the small savings you get by avoiding the attorney. In general this rule applies regarding legal fees: "pay me now or pay me later" (i.e., you'll wind up needing an attorney to straighten things out later if you cheap out with store-bought forms now).
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I did hire an Elder Lawyer and it was done quickly...however, when he did our Rights of survivorship for the house...so that my mom could remain there till she died...he made a mistake on the title transfer and it still isn't resolved..she lost her Star tax deduction...and it has not been reinstated. He stopped answering phone calls and ignored letters..Now I have to go tot the County Clerk to fix it....The best of them run and disappear after they are paid. So...be sure to double check everything and get an outside Senior Care agency to go over the results. There are so many ways to screw up....Good luck!
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While you're having all this paperwork done - now might be the time to discuss with your mom a DNR (do not resesitate order) - whether she wants one in place or not. It's always a hard conversation, but since everything else is getting done, having or not having that ready (her wishes) now is the time to comfortably discuss this with her and if she wishes get that done also (that is also a form her doctor, hospital, rehab or Assisted Living Facility would have). Yes mrtvz64 this really is a family here on this site - we've all been there, done that and have wonderful suggestions to share. Being a caregiver is not easy - but this site is great for getting answers from others and also moral support. Good luck & God Bless!
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I want to thank everyone for their heartfelt suggestions and advise. I'm going to call him today, and I will let you know what happens. Thank you all for taking the time to answer me and more importantly for caring. We really are a family here.
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Not much more to add but to say get it done Sooner rather then Later, you never know when you are going to need the items. I like Lili's idea about picking up the current documents and talking them someplace else. Their is a way of being polite and saving "face" with the family member that is trying to help. Sooner rather then Later..!!!!
Blessings,
Bridget
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These are all standard forms done by the paralegals on staff which also serve as the witnesses. No more than 1 week. Agree with all, you need a new attorney, find an elder care specialist - you many never need that level of expertise but if you do there is someone you can refer to who already has your history.

IMHO, at a minimum you need to do:
- Statutory Durable Power of Attorney (a Financial Power of Attorney)
• Medical Power of Attorney
• Living Will /Advance Directives
• Declaration of Guardian in Event of Incapacity
• HIPAA Waiver
Good luck.
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This should have been NOTORIZED and Witnessed while you were in the office. APPARENTLY the Motion did not go through......Call and make an appointment with your County's Adult Elderly Services and find the Elder's Attorneys office that goes by a Pay Scale for payment, usually zero owed by the income level. REMEMBER, the person must NOT be incompetant at the time, and be of sound mind. Hurry.
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Stay away from family. You know the old saying "the cobbler's children have no shoes". My brother in law was executor of my mother in law's will. He is a CPA with his own firm in Florida. It took forever! Worked on it when he had time. Too much foot draggery. It was finally completed and no one is angry (now). With your family you get put on the back burner. Find a good elder lawyer. :)
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I did all the same as you are wanting done. It took only a day. Mom used this attorney before for her original will, POA and such. When it was time to change we called the office and told them what was to be changed. We went next day, attorney talked to mom privately to make sure thats what she wanted to do. And that was that is was done. Left office that day with certified copies.
Since it was an update mom paid around $75.00 for all. If this attorney is dragging it out saying its complicated timely paperwork and then charge you a small fortune. THEY ARE RIPPING YOU OFF!!!!!! Moms paperwork really looks no different then what I seen on most DIY legal sites. Its a basic template and just fill in the blanks.
I agree with all the other posts. Get a new attorney. Call around and ask just how long it would take to get these documents done. Months are just an excuse to soak more money!!!!!!!! Remember an Attorney WORKS FOR YOU!! YOU HIRED THEM AND YOU CAN FIRE THEM!!!!!!!!
Good luck!!
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I agree with the other posts. We did this for my Mom and it only took about a week for him to get all paperwork together and then after everything was signed he told us when he would be filing everything. I did a internet search for lawyers and elder care to find someone locally. You might be able to ask a friend for a suggestion of a law firm to contact. I would thing anyone who does family law would be able to provide this service for you. These are not complicated documents to get made. Good luck.
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It took us one week to receive the new documents (all of the above that you were requesting from your lawyer). You definitely need a new lawyer; don't pay this one; and get your documents in order! One week is plenty long enough.
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Get an attorney who does elder law and it should only take days.
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it should not take but a few mintues. My Mom had to have one drawn up when she had cancer in 2000. I found a place, for Elderly I think thru Area on Aging Agency. Gave me a number. I took my there, no charge because she over 60, and did the POA/Durable and Advice Directive in a hour tops. NO wait no months time and no cost. I like free. Check with your local AOA and see if they can tell you who is serving the Elderly. This place was lawyers, did stuff Pro Bono. Took care of people with low income. I did my Advice Directive this last time we went to make changes in 2005 before she was full advice Alzheimer's now. Look for Free for Elderly AOA should help.
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I agree with both posts above. Her doctor should have copies of Health Care Directives, if not stop by a local Assisted Living Facility or Rehab center - they have these forms also and would happy to give you a copy (it's great for their business -they never know if you might need them down the line so they can be very accommodating). A will - if not too many complications can be done with information online as Lilliput (first post) states. I looked up POA's and Durable POAs online and actually took sections of many and made one up for my mom - I put in everything possible even if I didn't know whether she would need it - better to be safe than sorry - had her sign it in front of a notary and we were set to go. When I needed to use them, every facility was impressed with my "lawyer" (so they thought) because I made sure the notary and mom initialed each page and numbered the pages 1 of 5, 2 of 5, etc. They thought my "lawyer" was VERY efficient. YES, you definitely need a new attorney (if you want to go that route) - it shouldn't take that long at all, and as the other post said and I agree - you shouldn't have any relative or friend helping you with these papers - it's none of their business. And go back and get the papers from the original lawyer. Good luck.
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Perhaps a relative who might be doing you a favor is not the best choice. A simple will, health proxy and POA should be ready in days. An elder lawyer is a good choice because he/she will be able to guide you if nursing care, medicaid, elderly rights, etc issues come up later. Good luck.
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Hello. I just wanted to say that I work with the aging population. I recently worked with a client to get this done and it was finished within one week and there was even some complicated issues with this client involving a trust. I think I might find a new lawyer and search for one that specializes in elder law.
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GET A NEW ATTORNEY. Sorry to have shouted that. I am so sick of these guys...they do relatively nothing then bill you big time for it. Related or not, he should not be treating you as though you are "bothering" him. These documents are just standard "fill in the blank" forms and should not take 5 months to complete.
I do not know how complex your Mom's assets are, but if they are not, you can create your own documents online. I have had personal experience with Legal Zoom and Legacy Writers - both were great. They have up to date information about your state's guidelines and have people you can call to ask questions. Sometimes doctor's offices have forms for your state's Health Care Directive.
Personally, I would not want a relative such as yours knowing my Mom's personal business. Tell him that you will be dropping by to pick up your Mom's information because it sounds like his "plate is full." Then do it.
Just tell your Mom that you wanted an attorney who specializes in elder issues and is more knowledgeable about this area.
Really, if he wants to hear about truly "busy" people, have him come to this forum!!
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