newtonjoyce Asked August 2011

My father loves to go outdoors and pee! Anyone else have this issue? How do you deal with it?

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My father, loves to go outdoors and pee! I don't really care if he does it in the back out of sight. However, in the front yard!?! I have told him to stay in the back yard but with dementia....he forgets. Sometimes he gets past me and I don't notice he is outside.
I can only hope the neighbors will turn their head, but if a child were to come by, that is an entirely different story. It is really embarrassing.
Anyone else have this issue? How do you deal with it?

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EXPERT Carol Bradley Bursack Aug 2011
It's possible that he's unsure about using the bathroom, and it's easier for him to figure out what to do if he goes outside. or else, in his mind he's reliving old hunting or fishing trips - or some other "guy" times - when such things are common. Alzheimer's makes the past real as the present gets fuzzy.
However, you see the unfortunate results if a child walks by - indecent exposure. Likely the authorities, if called, would be reasonable, but that depends on their ability to use common sense.
My suggestion would be that you lock the front door with a very high (out of sight) key only deadbolt. Keep it locked and the key in your pocket when you can't keep an eye on dad.
Is the back yard fenced or heavily treed? That would help out there, so use your judgment. You may need to use locks that are unnoticed an/or inaccessible to him on all doors so that he only goes out when you are with him. He sounds as though he could go into a wandering stage, which would be terrible - he could just wander off after his peeing adventure. It's likely time to keep a tighter hold on him for his own safety.
I hope you hear from some others who have experienced this. Anyone out there have this problem?
Take care,
Carol
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newtonjoyce Aug 2011
Carol, you are right...it was a bathroom issue. My husband got to the root of the problem last night. As men age, private parts drop ( like womens breasts I guess) so my husband lowered the water level in the toilet. Apparently this is a common issue for men of many ages. We shall see how this helps and I will take your suggestions into deep consideration. Thanks!
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wha? lowered the water level? oh never mind. lol well I can relate.. many times I catch my husband outside going on the poor tree, and he is 54 with no AD, God help me if that man ever gets AD. Oh the yard is fenced in but still. When I see this behavior and ask him why? His answer "cause I can". go figure! o.O
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newtonjoyce Aug 2011
haha, yes, I did a little survey and men like to do it outside....cause they can I guess. Not all though.
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jeannegibbs Aug 2011
Good advice, Carol!

Just as a point of information, the high locks may be appropriate for many Alzheimer patients, but not for all forms of dementia. My husband did rehab in a memory care unit, with simple high locks on the doors. That would not have presented even a minor annoyance to him or to his roommate. (A deadbolt with key-only access would not have been suitable in that setting.) I put a lock on the door to our basement, as a safety measure, and dear hubby got a screwdriver to take the hinges off. In the 8 years he has had Lewy Body Dementia he has never had wandering behavior. Since many people tend to think that "dementia" means "Alzheimers" I like to point out that there are differences. Nearly half of older dementia patients have something other than Alzheimers.
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