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Two of my children live with my mom one has been there for a long time the other one has kinda moved in taking controll of her money which i dont like there is a lot to lose and he has taken money in the past my brothers keep pushing them letting them have all this control and my mom thinks if you are a man then you know best so she listens to my brothers and its really taking its toll just because they dont want to deal with it my father is the sunshine in my life passed a year ago he made sure I knew where all of his finaces were and all his important papers I was the one that got him to go to the hospital were he past within two days my one brother brought him some insure and told him he looked pale the other one was just to busy which what ever they can deal with that but my point is that the need to have the children back off let me be their for my mom with out their being up in my moms business mom wants me there and Iwant to be there with her but she is really old school long time ago where the men take care of the women which we all know that just isnt right my brothers live 2 hours away they dont she her and i cant stand when my child is telling me what i need to do or what i dont need to do .the reason this is so hard is because my is mom is so hard of hearing so if i try to explain that her grand kid just dont need to be so up in her business she gets so confused i just give up because i because there is so much i just want everyone to step back let me take care of my mom they shec desevers to be taken care of

thank you

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You didn't mention your Mom's health or mental state. How is she other than hearing. If hearing is an issue someone needs to adress that. If your Mom trusts you and wants you to care for her get that legally documented, such as Durable POA. If she does have health and/or mental issues you can than assist her without a problem. If she doesen't give you POA and she is mentally stable she has the power to do as she pleases, this dosen't mean you should not or cannot get POA, only if she dose not grant this power. If she is in any danger as far as her living conditions or health and noone has POA. This is definately a problem that needs attention. This brings out the ugly in most families. Most important is Mom's condition and money to care for "her needs" noone should be spending her money on anything or anyone else, or using her assets as in her home for thier own personal gain. If her home is used for her care purposes that is a different story. Bring this all to everyones attention and you'll weed out the good the bad and the ugly. Good Luck!!!
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Be the MOM, hopefully you raised your boys better then this?? KICK them out of your mothers and tell them the "free ride" is over and to get a life and grow up. Sorry, I am from the old school and had to earn everything and nothing was given to me. SACK UP as the boys in my office say..!!!! This does seem like Elder abuse, they will walk away from grandma once her funds run out. So sad, SACK UP, KICK THEM OUT..!!!!!
Blessings,
Bridget
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You need to get yourself a good Elder Lawyer. My daughter tried the same thing without me knowing what was going on. Well I recently turned the tables without her knowing and got my Mom's original will and also the POA. She now has no say in any of Mom's wishes......and man is she pissed.
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If you have a husband, why doesn't he go tell those two sons to get a life and get out of your mother's life and house? How old are those two boys? It sounds like your mother may not be competent to handle her business in a business like manner and you just might have to go for guardianship for her protection if you or some other adult does not have POA already.
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Who has Power of Attorney for your Mom?
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Do you have a strong aunt or uncle that might agree with you? Also if your mom doesnt understand because shes hard of hearing, first get her a good hearing aid and then write her a lovely note that she can read in private. Ask her to write you back and tell you what she thinks. Write big because some moms like me dont like to read small letters. Your a good daughter and you will be blessed, but you've got to get a hold of your kids and I dont know about you but I am discipline my kids with a belt. If theyre use to using cell phones, take it away, if theyre use to driving a car, take the keys away. Your the mom, not them - right? If they get unruly call the police to give them a warning. It is a form of elder abuse when your kids have full control over your mothers finances. Maybe you can talk to a lawyer. Some offer a free consultation. Get their advice and see what happens. If they are old enough to drive and work, they are old enough to move out as well. Place a hold on your moms bank account and maybe this will wake them up.
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Does your mom have a sister or brother that can help you with this? You may find it easier to cope with this if you have the support of a third party. Even a spiritual leader is an option. This sounds like to much to handle on your own. Your kids are taking advantage of your mom and you. Please try to find an authority figure to help you sort this out.
Carol
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