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I called APS on my kids dad and my daughter is care giver to him. He refuses to go to his doctors appointment and doing self neglect. We are tired of negitivity and we are happy APS is involved he only will listen to Higher Authourity over his family the brain is set that way cause of his Dementia..
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In my state, questions would be asked of me as well as my neighbors as to why I had not helped my mother. She is very stubborn, we live in a small community, and people understand her refusal to obtain help. Your question is one I have asked of social services.They have suggested that I keep a log, take pictures, and turn them over to Mom's doctor,who is my doctor, if I get desperate. The doctor cannot reveal the source of his information from me due to the confidentiality laws, but he has a legal obligation to inform social services. I don't know if this helps, but it helps me to have a plan. Best wishes!
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My mother was in assisted living and the owner scheduled a doctor's appointment for her. My mother refused to go to the doctor. "I'm not sick" she said and then she moved in with me. My mother got cancer which obviously had metasticized (she is a retired oncology nurse) and had a mastectomy but beyond that never went to the doctor. I talked to her about it but I decided that she was an adult and able to make that decision. One night when I was not at home she fell and I found her on the floor. I called the paramedics and they took her away. She is now in a nursing home--a terminal patient. She had no quality of life and did not want to extend her life. I allowed her to make her own decisions as I believed that she was alert enough decide for herself. So far, no one has filed any negligence charges against me, although I am afraid that might happen.
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I agree with the comments of others left thus far. If you feel your mom is in an unsafe situation and you are unable to get her to change her mind about the care she needs you may need to call Adult Protective Services to help you and your mom figure out resources and options in the area. This of course is used when you feel you have exhausted all other alternatives and feel your mom is unsafe.
Wishing you strength, courage and happiness.
Deanna
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As an administrator of an assisted living, I see similar circumstances: In this country an individual's right to self determination is strongly protected. Even when someone has obviously lost the ability to make sound decisions, unless a court has appointed a guardian, their rights are protected - even from their children.
So the short is no. (I am not a lawyer, only a gerontologist, so don't take my word as gospel). You will not be held liable.
But you CAN call Adult Protective Services and they will send a PET team out (psychiatric evaluation team), and if they find that your mom is either gravely disabled, a threat herself, or a threat to others they can hospitalize her on a 72-hour involuntary hold. Which is ussually an opportunity to get her evaluated and on medications.
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I too am in agreement with Carol on this----as checking with an elder care attorney or agency will most likely give you some peace of mind on how to proceed from here.

If you indeed see that your Mom is in need of medical attention-you might want to speak with your or her PCP-and explain the symptoms that you have observed.

Best to you and your family,

Hap
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If she doesn't want to go to the doctor you can't hog tie her and MAKE her go. If she is doing things that can be harmful to another person or herself, you can call paramedics to take her to the hospital ER for evaluation. They will do a full vital organ check up while there. You cannot be held liable for her not getting medical attention if you are not her poa over medical decisions. If she looks like she is being neglected, you COULD be held responsible for elderly abuse. Keep the cupboards stocked, her clothes clean and the house clean, and hopefully she keeps herself clean. And her bills paid.
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Furthermore, you must do what it best for your mother's care regardless if it makes her angry or not for that's what she entrusted you with the POA to do.
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I agree with the above. There are also Doctors that make housecalls....as I've come to recently find out! You might try checking into that in your area. Good luck, it's not easy....
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It is the medical POA that is the important one in this situation? In that case, you could call the ER and notify her doctor.
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Do you have the Power of Attorney for your Mom? My sister has the POA for our mother and in Florida, she is legally responsible for Mom's medical care. I do agree with Minding Our Elders response. Your Mom may be more likely to go if one of her friends accompanies you. Elder care is very difficult, as my sisters as I discovered when we tried to help Mom with her finances and keeping herself and home clean. Mom had Alzheimer's and we did not know that at first. Mom thought we were trying to steal money from her and would not move in with any of us. I wish you and your Mom the best. Melody
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You are not likely legally liable, however you may want to check with an elder law attorney just to be sure you state doesn't have unusual laws. One thing you can to is ask Social Services to do a welfare check. That may help get the wheels turning.

Elders who won't go to the doctor aren't anything new. It's frustrating to the family, but very common. Try a third party first - someone like a friend she cares about. If that doesn't work, you could try Social Services.
Good luck,
Carol
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