stacysuzanne Asked July 2011

My mom has a mental disorder and is a liability to my property. How do I ask my mother to leave the house I own if we have no formal rental agreement?

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I cannot continue to allow my mother to live in this house, it is in my backyard. She has schizo-effective disorder. She is a liability. I cannot afford to insure this house with her living in it.She has a reasonable income. Her aging and illness has become too much for me. I have no able siblings. I do not want POA. I have tried to find community services to help. She has repeatedly called the sheriff to report my wrongdoings. (imagined or justifiable) she is not handling her finances properly. She abandoned her own house, stopped paying the mortgage,taxes,insurance and upkeep. I have given up, her illness will not allow me to help and it has taken it's toll on me. I have half the income as she does, on disability, no food stamps, my car is not running, and I need the income I could receive by renting the house. She has been going to church begging for money and to neighbors for food. Since she doesn't pay her bills and is begging for food, I can only assume she is spending her money on her insatiable nicotine addiction. I cannnot afford any expense for an elder attorney. I live in TN.

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N1K2R3 Aug 2011
Shedrick 1032: You're not the owner of the property. Ownership involves a Deed or another form of Conveyance. You are a renter. As long as you are in residence, you should pay the $500.00 in rent. If the arrangement is uncomfortable for you, you could find another home to rent.
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jeannegibbs Aug 2011
Shedrick, many people who have never had a mental problem in their lives pay rent or room and board to family members they live with. It sounds like a mutually beneficial arrangement. Your rent has enabled your daughter to own a home and give her children stability. This is not always easy or even possible for single moms. And it has given you a place to live surrounded by family love for a reasonable price. Unless there were some promises made that you haven't mentioned, this all seems above board and logical to me.

And congratulations on your recovery.
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michfla317 Aug 2011
Shedrick, I am glad to hear you are recovering and how nice that you have family to back you up!!

My personal opinion is that technically you are paying your daughter rent. If you don't have the responsibility and obligation to contribute to the property taxes, the utilities, the property insurance and the maintenance on the home and are not legally named on the deed, you are not a "co-owner." It would probably be more expensive for you to be a co-owner so be glad that you are able to rent and not have all the other expenses that go with home ownership.

Good luck to you and take care!
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I am a recovering mental patient on SSI. I have been living with my only daugther and two grandchilred for the last six years. Ever since I moved in I have been giving here a total of $500 a month which for rent or mortage. Now that we have stayed in the home for the five years to not to have pay back the loan on the down payment, beginning of this year my daughter wantsme to still give her $500 a month. Since my income from SSI has been included for her mortage payment, why I am not included as co-owner? What are my legal rights in this situation? Please help feel I have no rights because of my past mental problems.
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JudyC Jul 2011
its called the Adult Abuse line. Tell them your story. remember, you are an adult too.
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CaraMia Jul 2011
Why not tell your mother that she needs to move out, possibly to AL so that you can rent out the room to someone because you are financially in need? Give her sufficient time to move. If she doesn't do it on her own, take her to an ALF and make clear that you have a date in mind for her to move out. Sometimes one has to take the lead to move a parent forward to their next life transition step. It won't be easy, but you need to make clear to her that your financial situation requires you to take action sooner rather than later. Whatever you do, good luck to you!
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Hank4422 Jul 2011
I just rented a 5x5 room at a self-storage to safeguard some of my stuff. I felt it was necessary due to my Mom's history of throwing stuff away and careless cooking habits.

I've also labeled the circuit breakers for the stove and oven and turn them off whenever I have to leave the house for any length of time.
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cmagnum Jul 2011
Oh, NAMI is not the only one out there. The Mental Health Association in your state and county might have some resources too.
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N1K2R3 Jul 2011
You could have her committed to a mental facility.( Mild to Moderate care). I do not like "Group Homes".
You didn't say how old she is, how old you are, and if there are any other people to consider. If her house does sell, she will have to sign the Agreement For Sale and the Closing Statement. Since you do not want POA, someone else will have to do it. You need help, dear.
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dsteph1965 Jul 2011
I recommend getting some type legal opinion. My cousin had similar problem with her Mother and did not step up to the plate. A previous neighbor of her Mother knew of the situation and took legal action and the Mother ended up in nursing home and neighbor gained medical/financial control, which included sale of her house, bank account, social security, etc. The daughter was denied visitation rights and this went on for years until Mom died. Be aware that there is always someone willing to take advantage of these type situations especially if there is money to be gained.
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