Aging mother has serious debt issues, but resents daughter's efforts to help. What now?
My mom is 75 and fairly healthy, with the normal wear and tear you'd have at that age. She is incredibly intelligent (Mensa Mom!) and still working as a registered nurse. The issue: her finances are completely out of control. She owes thousands and thousands (I'm talking over $150,000 here...) About nine months ago, she came to me asking for financial help. It was only going to be for a few months. I agreed, but before I passed out the cash, I insisted (as nicely as possible) that she sit down with me and my husband to talk about her options. Mistake! Now I've heard through my brothers that she's furious with me for "trying to tell her how to run her life". In addition, she absolutely refuses to share her financial plans, will, anything should something happen to her. However, that has not stopped her from taking my money. Did I mention she has assets that she refuses to sell? Did I also mention that I have a mentally-retarded brother that she has guardianship of? And another unemployed brother who lives with her that has Asberger's? I love her dearly...but I'm completely freaking out! Any advice? I'm ready to run for the hills and let everyone else sort it out.