My wife has dementia.

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The last question I asked, well, turned into a chewing me out fest. Let's see if this is better. Early as a child, my wife hit her head. She had her 1st brain surgery. She had radiation to take care of the rest of the tumor, but there were some complications. They gave her too much radiation. In 2010, She had an MRI. She had another tumor growing. It was the size of a flattened out soft ball. It broke through her skull, nearly breaking through the layers of skin that connected the skull to the forehead. It was the same area. So, we find out that she has a massive amount of radiation . The radiation is causing the tumors to grow. So, the tumors and the radiation are a cause of a lot of problems. She goes to the doctor, every 3-6 months for the check ups of her tumors. She started to show signs of dementia in 2011, right after her 2nd brain surgery. The radiation caused a 2nd growth to appear. It broke through her skull, and nearly penetrated her skin. We were lucky to catch it in time. I won't say what she's done, but lets say it's all the typical signs of dementia. Lately, she uses shorter words and her sentence structure is well off from being a normal adult female in her age range. She has a tendency to have meltdowns over the smallest things. She brings up stuff that should have been taken care of from months ago. She knows she's getting worse. She had a cognitive test, from a couple months ago. it shows a drop in her percentage. With the dementia test maybe scheduled 6-8 months out, and her showing signs like she is, it scares me. I feel batter and bruised. The doctor who we talked to said, " we want to take a blood test to see, if if there is nothing wrong in her blood. If there is nothing wrong in her blood, then she has dementia." The blood test came out normal. She has dementia. Now, we wait until the hospital can get us in...

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CW, very much what I was thinking!

Gene, your wife's cognitive abilities are declining, so does the cause really matter? She clearly needs help in coping with her emotionality, which may be driven by lack of understanding. Psych meds may help.

Do you have other family assisting you in caring for your wife?
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I think it really doesn't matter whether she has Alzheimer's or is suffering from the effects of invasive tumours or from the after effects of treatment, the bottom line is her cognitive abilities have been compromised and she is gravely ill. I'm sorry. Given that you are 36 I assume she is quite young as well? I think it is time someone takes the time to step back and look at her prognosis and make some realistic decisions about what comes next. I would urge you to read the book Being Mortal by Atul Gawande, a very insightful read about these issues.
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genebees - I'm sorry, but I'm not sure what your asking for help with..?
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Gene, I'm sorry you felt that we chewed you out.

Your wife has recurring brain tumors. Does her neurologist think that there is dementia in addition to whatever cognitive damage may have been caused by the growth of the tumors? What kind of "dementia test" are you having to wait so long for?

Is there a doctor ( perhaps a psychiatrist) involved in her care who can prescribe meds to help with her agitation?
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